Emotional state of mind

My words are meaningless like my life
It's always been about the pain and about the strife 
I keep calling out her name from the dark
Her heart is dead,  she's gone and left her mark
I scream out loud to soften some of my pain
My tears they came like falling rain
The note I wrote her tears apart
She abandon me here cuz I stole her heart
I feel so used so broken so bent 
All the words she told me she never meant
I lye awake and wonder why I always Cross my heart and hope to die