Expectations

You molded me to your own desires
Ambitions saturated in self-hatred
Enforced the path you chose for me
Through control you were sated

I based my self worth on your
Opinions and became jaded
Never once was I good enough
Constantly abused and degraded

You told me I didn't try hard enough
Surely I could achieve much more
Bragging to all your friends about me
Then shaming me with a closed door

I killed the child I was inside
To be what you were looking for
Still I never felt you glance my way
If you weren't judging what I wore

You fully turned your back on me
For messing up your system
When I gained a voice of my very own
Suddenly you were a "victim"

I learned of self-harm and substances
The peace of mind was addictive
When I was admitted to the hospital
You believed I was just vindictive

You spoke of me once again today
No longer pushing me to work harder
Now that I've thrown my life away
You can play the role of a martyr