Glass half empty

Glass half way full
A perception I could never see
A way of thinking I could never acquire

To my defeatist brain, optimism is foreign knowledge
A foreign concept I was never able to grasp

Perhaps my pursuit for such way of thinking was lacking in determination
Perhaps I was never really seeking
But how can I really be looking for a way of life when all I see are the negatives to its best aspects?

As if fighting a ferocious lion, I find myself powerless
Helpless against this mindset of mine that rules my thoughts
This mindset of mine that blocks me from hope
Yet I can never truly complaint

These doubts of mine shield me from the excruciating pain of self-disappointment 
How can I ever change something that keeps me safe?
How can I ever change something that keeps me sane? 

Defeatist and pessimistic are traits I will gladly accept
As optimistic and irrealistic are one of the same in my glossary
And the latter is a trait I refuse to have define me

Pessimism is one of my greatest qualities
It will help to propel me to greater heights in my life; of that I am sure
Which is why I will always see the glass half empty