Got me again

Here we are again sharing a room 
Like old times 
Stopping my tears by opening my eyes wide,a tad too late because had I bothered to use my sight this hurt wouldn't have me again with glass in my eyes
Shattered pieces flowing from my heart
Hoping and wishing none of my organs were torn while making way to my eyes 
But I feel like my throat could have been damaged because no sound can leave my mouth at this time 
I have so much to say but if I dare let a word escape I could collapse into mania
Surveying the empty room while trying to keep composure trying to convince myself that I am okay
While the mind plays who you fooling
How in the world is this all familiar 
This hurt,this pain,this candid disappointment not captured on camera
Darn it I did it
I went fully in with no safety features like an untrained fool trusting human nature would be kinder with the heart
But surprise no surprise 
Sometimes while leaping for joy you can find yourself face first in a puddle of pain
Stained by rage
Sitting across your own I told you so's of old journal entries you hadn't bother rereading and checking in your lessons learned
You enrolled in the same class with stained books where pages stuck together so you missed so many necessary lessons
I was certain I got this
But here we are it got me again 

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