Happy Birthday

 Happy Birthday

I waited; so long for you...to conceive
A positive result; could I achieve?
Inside me you fluttered and started to grow 
Soon a bump; You started to show

This was it ! My life now had purpose
No longer a freak out of a circus
This was the job I wanted to do 
Love you and always be there for you.

Seventeen years ago this very night
Excitement; contractions; at first they were slight!
A tsunami of pain rode through my skin
If only I had known that this pain within

Would not leave me now but continue to grow
Would I always be the clown in the show?
Too good to be true, I now had a son
I haven't escaped misery what's done has been done.

I'm sorry for bringing you into this world 
Unable to protect you, not giving my word
I've failed you; I've failed at being a Mom
I truly am sorry my beautiful son

New Years resolution? Take one day at a time
And not feel guilty;I committed no crime
Look to the future instead of the past
Believe we'll be together at last 

Tomorrow I'll blow out your candles and pray 
For you to soon see the light of day
Another year lost...A new one just begun
Happy Birthday!

Happy Birthday Son xxxx