Poem -
Hold my Hand
I see your sappy smile,
Yet I know there's sadness.
I hear your laughter,
Yet you're surrounded by darkness.
I don't see your tears,
But I know they're there.
I don't hear your cries,
But I know you're scared.
It's hard to comprehend,
The feelings you feel.
It is torturous heartache,
And you wonder if it will heal.
I don't see the tears glisten,
I don't see the pain.
I don't hear your anguish,
But I know it's attacking again.
I ask you to open your eyes,
I ask you to look into mine.
I'm holding out my hand,
And I want you to take it this time.
Turn around and take a chance,
Believe in what you can.
Forget about what you can't,
And come and take my hand.
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Comments
This is a stunning example of the power of faith.......poetically....it's set up perfectly in its formatting..... from the sadness and the tears of being 'scared'!!.... to the belief imparted in taking a chance........ however ......it ALL comes from ONE point of view...... the significant other has NO voice here.... which I absolutely LOVE....... it makes for 'the power of romantic Love' to win out through the poetic voicing of its author!!...... Gorgeous poetic quality....... perfect rhythm and timing...... and the wishful thinking of Naivete' .......which always leaves the wisher... wishing they had never opened themselves up to the wounds of heartbreak!!...... I pray that this is a fiction.... but if not..... May the Gods of Love and Romance smile upon you and your beautiful mind this day......EXCELLENT poetry!!......ALL STARS!!....LOVE and ROCKETS!!......T xo ???✳✳♥♥???
Hi Tony,
Your comment is greatly appreciated! I'm very happy you liked it and thanks for your kind words. It's fiction in a way, but it's also based on a friend of mine.
Thanks again !??
"Yet [your] you're surrounded by darkness.
There seems to be an epidemic lately of "your" (possessive) being substituted mistakenly for "you're" (a contraction of "you are") in much of writing today, Sophie.
The best way to remember is that if you're saying something like: "You are an excellent writer," This would call for the contraction—you are. "You're an excellent writer." Thus, if "you're" can be written in place of "you are" then that's the word you'll wanna use.
You've done it properly all the rest of the way through and your free style poem is a very hard-hitting, powerfully well written tribute to romance and sticking it out.
When the going gets tough the tough stick around and tough it out.
Nice!!!
~Dean Kuch ツ
Hi Dean, that grammar error completely slipped passed me!! Thanks for that. I've edited it now ? many thanks for your comment ! I'm glad you liked it ?
It happens to all of us, Sophie.
You're more than welcome. :}
This is such a beautiful poem. It shows honest pain and care. I've read it at least three times and it gives me chills each time. Wonderful job.
Hi Alessandra,
I'm so happy you like it, it means a lot :)