I No Longer Write To You

perhaps I am in that other life 
because I no longer write about you 
but I suppose that I would not have had to announce that to the world 
if I was not thinking about you
because I do from time to time but there's a nothingness
I can openly tell you that I am okay 
I'm doing great
I like this quiet life 
it was just what I had needed
it came at the right time and I love you with all my heart but I am very glad that you're gone 
let's hope for good because in another life that is what I would've wanted
but no not for you to meet someone else 
maybe I can't handle you moving on 
in another time I would've wanted you to long for me but to never come back to me 
and then when I see you again
your eyes will light up and you will tell me 
that you've missed me but this time I will tell you to keep it moving
I left you for a reason
in another life I never want you to stop loving me
and I hope that your heart gets broken a million times over 
that was something that I could've never done
I am not a heartbreaker 
and yes this is a very fucked up life that I am describing
but 
It's okay because I know that in this life it would not be this way
so it is okay to fantasise over the impossible
right?
I am sane.
     - please do not love me but do