I'll Be Okay

I feel great
At 12 pm
Just rolling out of bed 
Listening to the sounds of 
A life I am not apart of 
Move around me

I am enthusiastic 
At 3 pm watching
My sister try on clothes 
While they berate themselves 
For not being enough

Everything is going amazingly 
At 6 pm
Sitting alone in my bedroom
Staring at a blank ceiling
Wrists aching with a 
Phantom pain                                                                           

I am perfectly fine 
At 12 am
Wide awake with my     
Mistakes glaring back at me
Sleep avoiding me at all costs 

I am at my best 
At 3 am 
Sheets kicked away
Face wet with tears
I cried for people 
Who will never love me

I am perfect
At 6 am
Nightmares being my only companion 
In my sleep
Or whatever you want to call this