Just a barmaid

"come on, get your coat off, its bloody ten too"
not even eleven and there forming a que
"just a barmaid" thats what they say
service with a smile, expected all day
we are more than just pint pourers , were councillors too
we listen to it all, oh what we go through
"here you go thats £3;40" 
"how bloody much?" sir its not 1940

we get the blame for the price of a pint
we have to clean the toilets, oh the shear delight
we love listening to you drunk moan of how you have it bad
while we are trying to multi task, serving your dad
when you whislte, shout, bang or wave your money
believe me babe you aint getting served in a hurry

when we dont know there names but we no them by drink
"come on you know him, half a mild, he stinks"
dont get me wrong its not all doom and gloom
we do have a laugh with a crowded room

serving two at once thinking your pro
then looking up and seeing no hope
4 deep at the bar making no eye contact
keepin your head down thats a fact

when all your buttons are pressed and your sweaty too boot
when all all want to do is put the drunks on mute
when you see that one walk in whose fussy as f&@£
all the staff fled, just my luck
fake smile cracks across my face
"usual Doris "full of grace
large glass, small wine, two cubes and soda
if i had a gun i think i would probably load her
we listen to stories of, cats funerals, shopping lists and worse
but if you dont listen you will get the barmaids curse

your name will be rotten about the town
of how you arent pleasant and wear a frown
they think were arsed but really we are
were just a helping hand from across the bar

we like a good laugh and banter is fun
sometimes rude, excuse the pun
we have our yocal locals who we love and think are ok
but its still nice to say "Tarra" after theyve been in all day

weve got 
pat with a bitter, a cider shandy if pissed
ste on coors light showing his fist
fran on gin, vodka or red
dom on anything, its time for bed
jenny on bacardi and diet coke
kyrin on spiced rum and abit of a toke
the other corinne on rosay until she can walk no more
dave hardwood on whiskey until he falls to the floor
margie on brandy and a drop of lemo
amie on different things the alcohol pro
lyndsey drinking fruit-bowels like its going out of fashion
jordan on shots like its his passion

then there is the two lovely barb and kipper
we do like him because hes a good tipper
so from us "just barmaids" please know our worth
we our here for You, we are the salt of the earth

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