L.I.F.E Chapter 2 Optimism

OPTIMISM
Learning Is Forever Empowering as you learn new methods and new ways
Watch how others do things and listen to what everyone else says
But there’s too many voices arguing loudly in my head
As all the different personalities fight to get fed
I am now positive I can change and confidently move forward
And my life’s fire is now burning and requiring more wood
So where do I start and how do I continue
To ensure all those demons have gone from within you
I have been very lucky to have great people around me
And I think that they hound me when they’re just trying to ground me
They knew I should ditch the ego and build self esteem
But I thought I knew it all and had all the answers it would seem
But one thing I forgot to add spice to the plot
Is can I confidently change the ways that got me in this spot
Life’s travelling salesman was knocking at my door
Trying to sell me shit methods that had never worked before
I had to be strong enough to say no when I was desperate to say yes
Saying yes meant failure whilst saying no meant success
I had to change all of my habits and remain distant from my friends
Otherwise my squalor will continue until my life ends
Some friends that I had didn’t really care about me
For them it was just about getting something for free
I would give them everything whilst offering me nothing in return
The thought they were using me was so hot it would burn
But I needed to feel included and forgetting them would be hard
And the fallout with these people could lead me mentally and physically scarred
But to finally see to be completely free
I had to be less about everyone else and more about me
Whilst I needed to be strong I had to remain humble
Otherwise I would isolate myself from support should I stumble
What are the good people wanting for helping me from the start
They in fact don’t want anything they just have a kind heart
And can see all the potential that I have left dusty on the shelf
And provide me with opportunities to begin to redeem myself
I can see it all so clearly and it’s all making sense
And the grass is definitely looking greener on the other side of the fence
But how do I get there, does life give me a map
Do I get a “good boy” t-shirt and a feather in my cap
Time goes so slow when you feel lonely and low
What the hell do I do and where the hell do I go
Everybody judged me and I now had a label
I was now the black sheep who was banned from life’s stable
But this wasn’t about everyone else it was just about me
Ridding the pain and the misery inside that only I could see
Life was about understanding that there were sacrifices and gains
Whilst keeping away from the place where pain and hurt reigns
So who was the real me and where is he hiding
All the voices in my head are now discussing and deciding
I hope it’s the good voice that makes his way to the front
As opposed to the bad voice who’s so cynical and blunt
How was I going to fit in with any of life’s different factions
Words weren’t going to cut it people wanted positive actions
How do I fit in and feel wanted, this is what I desired
Will my ambition and desire start to get tired
There are lots of others out there who don’t think I can do it
Who know I’ve tried several times before and blew it
But I need to keep trying, and not worry about the others
And I needed to find Mr Positive and his brothers
I was told life was great if I could just keep it simple
A simple life would look gorgeous and have a cute little dimple
But does keeping it simple mean that life becomes boring
As opposed to excitement of experimental exploring
I thought I was Mr Cool I wasn’t gonna be a nerd
Even just the thought of it was just utterly absurd
But how my attitude had been it certainly wasn’t working
Continual venturing into the shadows where Mr Addiction was lurking
So lets be a good boy and lets see where this will lead
I will do my best to fight off selfishness, ill discipline and greed
But the statement “nice guys finish last” is going through my mind
This is when people think you’re weak when you’re only being kind
The key thing I was thinking was what about my habits
I was the bad habit poster boy breeding poor routine like rabbits
I will do my best to change my ways and I now think that I can do it
And this time will be different this time I won’t say screw it
I will keep on the pathway to life’s glory and success
And sail the ship to sobriety and leave behind this fucken mess
I was keen to follow a new pathway letter to the law
And I knew that I could change I wanted it more and more
Addictions were all guests at my party of demise
And they were all a bit taken back as I started saying my goodbyes
They all started discussing was I leaving the party too early
Mrs Drugs was scathing and catty whilst Mr Alcohol remained surly
Uncle Tobacco was blowing up and Auntie Gambling was most upset
Who was going to go to the casino with her now to help her place her bet
I told them I was leaving and quickly walked out the door
But I missed them all dearly after not 5 minutes or more
I was off to greener pastures and to more enjoyable times
With no opportunity to wreck havoc and commit any of life’s crimes
What am I going to need on this exciting new adventure in life
Will I need some sort of survival kit in case I get in strife
I know the people around me will be pleased with my decision
And the fact the government of myself has made addiction extradition
My shit attitude and my bad habits were suddenly about to cease
Where do I sign the papers to complete this mental release
The feeling of empowerment as my new life was about to begin
And that I was now confident this was a battle I could win
I now had new found energy like I’d never felt before
Strutting like one of life’s soldiers fighting the addiction war
These new ways were going to take hard work with not a lot of fun
But I would give it all I have and try everything under the sun
New people new places learn some new social graces
And wait to see my family and the smiles on their faces
Now dignity and integrity can be placed
I now believe Longevity Is Fully Embraced