Mask

Can life be as we make it, or is life having its own way?
Every day I ask myself that question of why things happen...

My entire life I’ve always been in the shadows watching of the world I know very little...
When all of this started I didn’t know it would take over my life, feeling alone with nothing to follow...

What if I never existed, what would life really be like without one persons existence?
On this surface of what makes a person is not true...

It’s our darker half of us where we hide from the truth...
See that’s where I am on the run every day because I don’t think people could handle the real truth of who I am...

May have told some people about my hand of death...
Wanting to die is a greater force which more worse than death itself...

The path I’ve walked is one I am not proud of because I shut myself off from the world which is way worse...

I shut myself off from the world which does not understand me...
It feels like I’m fading away with vengeance...

I never wanted to be perfect, but just not who I am...
 I don’t want anyone to feel sorry for me because there is a whole other side of me...

Some of us have been pushed to a breaking point of giving up...
Taking our own life without living through the flames of pain...

In my case it’s different...
I can’t relate to people because my problem is something that is beyond my understanding...

Losing one friend made me believe I thought wasn’t true...
It is my issues of fighting a war within myself has pushed a very close friend away from me...

Now that the walls of my life are falling...
I can’t do enough to fix it...
Don’t want to spend the rest of my life tearing myself apart...

With what I am and my anger of feeling separated from this world...
 I hope at some point what I know will be known to others, not the entrapment of pain but the person behind the mask...