Not so perfect

My perfect little baby
I had this image in my head you see
But you were not quite perfect
Perhaps just not meant  to be

I'd dream of golden wavy hair
As I dressed you head to toe in pink
Of sparkling eyes and rosy cheeks
Not deformed , I was afraid
Of what people may think

So with your neck too thick
And speech that slurred
You would not have fit
In this uncaring world

To be teased at school, and called a fool
I spared you of all childish taunts
Yet your tiny body, void of all breath
My troubled mind it still, haunts

But now I see other children like you
Their not unhappy at all
In there own little world, yes its true
So what if they cant catch a ball

They seem loved and protected
Not teased or rejected
Good bye I said, before you were born
Yet why does my heart still feel so torn
If taking your life was the right thing to do.