Nothing But Fig Leafs

They say Adam and Eve pranced around wearing nothing

But fig leafs and the biggest grins the world has ever seen

Imagine NO FREAKING RULES!!!

All they had to worry about were those thorny bushes

And the occasional lightning bolt accompanied by a loud booming voice

Reminding Adam, “You owe me big time for this one, my friend!”

Caine and Abel along with seven other offsprings

Were the result of a lot of hanky panky

Do you blame him??? He was the luckiest dude EVER!!!

My question is, how did they keep those fig leafs in place

Scotch Tape? Elmer's Glue? Velcro?

Also why did they need those damn things to begin with

There wasn't another living soul to be seen

Imagine today, if we walked around naked as a jaybird

The population of the world would soar from 7 billion

To well over 20 billion in a matter of nine months counting twins

I'm not saying we couldn't carry on as usual with our daily routine

But perhaps the routine would be interrupted now and then

I have a suggestion for future generations if this becomes a problem

Think of Drew Carey nude!