Personal Hell

Our first moments together lovely tattooed my thoughts
Our laughter a sweetest melody of bliss
Both your little hands clenched tightly in mine
Generated my personal Utopia
Our bonds was God's purest gift
Although happiness was the picture we framed
Alcohol abuse was the spear through my rib cage
Combining beer and heated arguments
Was a vicious deadly thrust
Picking our family apart similar to apples from a tree
Plucked away from my arms reach in a instant
That day's form my nightmare's realization
Birthing mine and your mother's sinister tournament
A daily cut ripped opened causing infection to our lives
Without you boys I'm slowly bleeding out my sanity
Depression now occupying your empty room
Pictures on our walls a miserable flashback of what was
As your now unfortunately absent
A late rude awakening
Dubbing alcohol my sworn enemy
As The Joker to Batman
The villain tragically one this round of the fight
My mentality reconstructed to soberness
6 months today without a drop
6 horrible months without my worldly peace
I'm sincerely sorry for this damnation I've invited
Until we're together again
I miss you Brad and Ethan
My heart remaining vacant until we reunite again
Giving joyous emotions back to this house of horror
Until then this house is a monsterous place
As these word painfully echo periodically
"If I would of known what I know now"
Making me enraged with anger
Like the devil himself whispering these words
An no shacking my head doesn't get them out of my mind
I've made this bed of sorrowfulness
Now I lay in it nestled tightly
Here under this blanket of demonic plague warming regret
For now til this family's pieces are glued back together
Mom and Dad share this house of hell

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Comments
I can relate to your poem, as the demon we also fight in our home is alcohol. It's a huge demon to fight. I pray you will get your kids back soon. Hang in there, as 6 months so it is wonderful! Maybe one day soon I can say that... God bless ❤
Hey, I sincerely appreciate you comment! I got to say it's a rough situation. Although I've opened my eyes to my own mistakes, and realized how greatly pathetic it was of me. I've drink from the age of 13 until recently 31. I got to say though from all my misfortunes. This was the treacherous event in my life. I've ever witness. At the moment my children are gone, but my faith became restored. So I figured this was God's vision he want me to see. I have it's shameful. I can truthfully said anytime I think of alcohol. I just about vomit instantly. Thank you for your kind words. God bless you, and your family as well!
What Satan tries to use to kill us, God turns it around for our good. We have ansteonger testimony coming out of the fire. You will, and are having now, the "coming out of the fire" experience. Your ending to this story will be triumph. Just take God's hand, forgive yourself, and watch how He will redeem your life. ❤
Thank you for your blessing words of encouragement! Publish this has lifted and huge rock off my chest, and people like you just make it worth the time. Thank you so much!
A powerful write prowess, you've done well to go six months. I done dry January last year and I'd love to say I felt better for it but I never. Stay strong and hope things get better for you - Syd
Hey thanks! It's been a real eye opener. I guess it takes a major downfall. Before a person can see their own flaws. Glad to hear you over came it. Yes it does feel a lot better not drinking. Hope all goes well for you. Thanks for your comment!