Poem - 02 May 2017, 13:05

poems for poem a thon April 2017

jake aller

these 30 poems were published in the Triferta Journal as part of their Poem a Thon in honor of April Month of Poetry.

Poems by Jake Cosmos Aller For Poem a Thon 2017

JOHN (“JAKE”) COSMOS ALLER is a

April 1 Berkeley California

Growing up in the 60’s
In Berkeley almost 50 years ago

I think back
At those turbulent times
Those crazy wonderful times

Berkeley is a wonderful place
In many ways

Stuck forever in 1967
A true time travel experience

Every time I go back
And relive the memories
Of the 60’s

The 60’s never died
They continue

In college towns
Across the world

And Berkeley
Remains the mecca
Of the counter cultural revolution

Many things have changed
But the organic food revolution
Became mainstream

Marijuana spread out
The sexual revolution
Became mainstream

So much of the world
Is but a reflection
Of the revolution of the 60’s

And the conservative counter-revolution
That we are still fighting

So, I salute
My homeland

Berkeley
The center of my universe

April 2 Lithia Springs

Staying at Lithia Springs
Soaking in the healing waters

Soaking my pains away

Renewing my life

Renewing my love
As we both soak away

As the pain of life go away

And our love grows

With each soaking session

Life is good

At the hot springs water
Sooths us and smooth us

And we fall in love
Again and again

April 2 Walls

Trump wants a wall
Between America and Mexico

A wall against the southern hordes
A wall based on fear and hate

A wall to make America safe
A wall to make America great again

And yet I wonder
Will his wall fall

Like the Berlin wall
And the great wall

And all the other walls
They all failed
All of them

Walls divide us
Walls make us
Into different tribes

Between the pure
And the impure

St Reagan
Said Tear Down this Wall

Will future Presidents
Tear down this begotten wall

Or will it become a tourist attraction
Another great wall
Against barbarian hordes

April 4 Changes

I reflect upon my life
As the sun comes up

What could I have changed
What would I have changed

If I could go back in time
What would I tell my earlier self

What would I do differently
And what have I learned

The one thing
that I would not have changed
is meeting the women of my dreams

the chance meeting on a bus
that changed everything
in a moment

I met my fate
That day on the bus

And that is the end of the story

April 5 Facing Life’s Challenges Together

Woke up at 0 dark hundred
Vowing to boldly go forth

And face the challenges of the future
Without fear

Knowing that I have you there
Makes all the difference in the world
As we meet our fate

Together
Until the day we die

April 6 Wagontire, Oregon

1973

In 1973, I went on a road trip

With my father

We left Berkeley to go to Yakima

Where my father had a summer cabin

He was a college professor

And had July and August off

And we spent the summers

Every summer from 1968 to 1978

Our whole dysfunctional family

Our annual road trip to hell and back

As we did not get along at all

We decided to drive through Eastern Oregon

Just my father and me

Just for the hell of it

The rest of the family was already there

My father and I shared a travel lust

One of the few things we shared

This was one of our best trips

We got along

Which was unusual

Normally our relationship

Was fraught

As we were so different

We left Klamath Falls

A real nothing burg in those days

And headed east along highway 395

As we entered the desert of eastern Oregon

We entered a different world

High mountain dessert

Almost no one on the road

Then we saw the sign

Wagontire Oregon

100 miles ahead

99 miles ahead

98 miles ahead

We counted down the signs

Miles after miles

As we drove into the gathering dusk

We speculated that Wagontire

Must be a giant truck stop

In the middle of no where

We pulled into the town

Nothing there but a gas station

Motel and café

We decided to stop

Last gas for 100 miles

According to the highway signs

In the morning

We chatted with the owner

He was the sheriff, the fire chief

The owner of the motel, gas station

The only business in town

And the only place open

For one hundred miles

I noticed a highway sign outside

Welcome to Wagontire, Oregon

Population 2 ½ humans 10 dogs, 50.000 sheep

I asked the Sherriff

Say who is the ½ human?

My idiot son!

And we left.

200 miles later

We finally left Eastern Oregon

2016

In 2016 my wife and I drove through Eastern Oregon

As part of our epic cross country trip

10,000 miles

31 states in three months

On the way from Medford to Yellowstone

We drove along highway 395

The signs for Wagontire was gone

And we drove through the town

The motel was abandoned

Nothing there at all

And that sign was gone too

I said I suppose the idiot son

Never took over the business

And we speculated about Wagontire

And all other nothing burgs

We drove through that summer

Heart of Trump’s America

True fly over country

April 7 Watching Cats Hunt

Early morning

Watching two white cats

Hunting a white dove

The cats hunt in pairs

Tracking the bird

The bird flies away

Safe for now

And I think about the cats

And the hunt goes on

Such is life

And the fate of cats

And birds

April 8 Landlord Blues

I am a landlord

Owner of property

Here there and elsewhere

Have been for years

I have tenants

and tenant issues galore

I receive rent from the tenants

it seems money grows on the proverbial tree

but at times

from time to time

I hate being a landlord

I suppose in my heart

I am a socialist with a blending heart

But my wife is comfortable as a landlord

She calls me a hypocrite

And a wild romantic goat

Born under the sign of the goat

And I call her a capitalist pig

Born under the sign of the golden pig

April 9 Pane e circus 2017 Redux

By order of his excellency

Emperor Donald the First

The merciful,

the Christian King of Kings

The Sultan of Sultans

The Emperor of North America

Be it hereby decreed

That the ancient honorable gladiator games

Of the old Roman Empire

Have been restored

Each city in the Empire will host a team

They will compete for the honor

Of the national championship

The games will start

With fighting animals

Fighting fish

Roosters

Cheetahs

Tiger

Bears

Wolves

And lions

Then a man lion contest

With a heretic thrown to the lions

If he or she lives

They will be pardoned

Then then main games

Six men/women teams compete

Armed with swords, knifes, mace, clubs

They fight until one man or women remans

The victor of the game

Those who are prisoners

Can compete for their freedom

And a full imperial pardon

Let the games begin

Long may the games reign

In the new North America Empire

Praise be to the Emperor

Donald the First

April 10 Long Live Emperor Donald the Ist

Ladies and Gentlemen

My fellow American citizens

Greetings and salutations

Today is a momentous day

The old corrupt USA republic is no more

The constitution that once protected us

Has been overthrown and violated

The barbarians at the gate

Have taken over

And ruined the once great land

The last hope of the world

And so, I had no choice

But to kill the old rotten regime

And restore American greatness

To save democracy

I must destroy it

And so, starting today

I will serve as the Emperor of North America

I welcome Canada and Mexico

And the Caribbean islands

To join The North American Empire

As we rebuild America

Restoring American greatness

And making us all proud again

Proud subjects of the New American Empire

May the Empire reign forever and a day

Triumphant against all enemies

And so, I take this burden

Sadly, but gladly

I will serve you

As your Empire

And my son Donald

Will serve as our second emperor

Once I pass from this world

His son will serve as the third emperor

And so on until the end of time

And we will reign in our new capitol city

Colorado Springs

Until the end of time

Washington will remain in our hearts

As the capitol of the old Republic

But the heirs of the Roman Empire

Need a new Imperial Capitol

And soon we will conquer Mars

And expand our Empire to the Starts

Long Live the Empire

Long Live America

Good night

And may God Bless

This great Empire

April 11 3 Am Nightmares

3 am

The bewitching hour

When the wild things come out

And play

And torture you

With endless wild accusations

And nightmarish visions

As I toss and turn

Trying to escape

I look over at my wife

And as always

Repeat the mantra

Everything will be alright

And the wild things are banished

To the dark corners of my mind

And I recover my happiness

And I smile

As I look at the sleeping beauty

Still the most beautiful women in the world

Still the most alluring women in the world

Still in love with her

After 35 years

The love gets stronger and stronger

As she overcomes my despair

And the sun comes up

And I think to myself

What a wonderful life I have

With the women of my dreams

April 12 Zombie Apocalypse

Zombies to the right of me

Zombies to the left of me

Zombies ahead of me

Zombies behind me

Everywhere zombies galore

The end of the world had become

And the zombification of the world had begun

Zombies to the right of me

Zombies to the left of me

Zombies ahead of me

Zombies behind me

No one knew when or where the first zombies appeared

One moment zombies were just a collective figment of our deranged imagination

The next moment we were all living in a zombie apocalypse nightmare

Zombies to the right of me

Zombies to the left of me

Zombies ahead of me

Zombies behind me

Some said the zombies were created in a lab

Released by mad scientists and the military

Others said it was plague sent by God himself

To punish mankind for tolerating evil and moral depravity

Zombies to the right of me

Zombies to the left of me

Zombies ahead of me

Zombies behind me

The Christians and Muslims prayed

But their prayers went unheard

As they too soon became zombies

Zombies to the right of me

Zombies to the left of me

Zombies ahead of me

Zombies behind me

The zombies hunted in packs

Overwhelming their victims

Killing most instantly

But some they simply bit

And turned them into fellow zombies

Zombies to the right of me

Zombies to the left of me

Zombies ahead of me

Zombies behind me

The zombies did not attack one another

They preferred living live flesh

Human flesh but they ate everything they saw

Zombies to the right of me

Zombies to the left of me

Zombies ahead of me

Zombies behind me

And so, I ran into the countryside

With my fellow humans

Hit out deep in the woods

Hiding from zombies

And crazed cannibal gangs alike

Zombies to the right of me

Zombies to the left of me

Zombies ahead of me

Zombies behind me

The world ended that day

And our nightmare world began

Zombies to the right of me

Zombies to the left of me

Zombies ahead of me

Zombies behind me

April 13 Spring Doositsu for Angela Poem a Thon

Waking up seeing you there

Watching you as you wake up

Fills me with such sweat desire

Overcoming my mind

I sit watching you all day

Thinking of you all day long

Wild erotic imaginings

Love making to come

That old blues song come to mind

I just want to make love to you

Nothing more than that that

I end this morning with this thought

You are still the most wonderful

The most beautiful creature

In the whole universe

April 14 Love Jones

I got the Love Jones, baby

And it won't leave me alone

I got the Love Jones, baby

And it won't leave me alone

I've been writing these love poems

All day long

And I have been dreaming

Of all the ways, I could make love

To my secret lover

If only she will let me be

If only she will open her heart

And let me in

Perhaps the love Jones

Might leave me along

But I got the love Jones

Bad baby

Can't you tell?

That the love Jones

Has grabbed my Soul

Twisted it up into little pieces

And I need you

To unravel the Love Jones

I need you to answer the call

Of the Love Jones Baby

I need you

To let me be free

Of the spell

Of the Love Jones

I got the Love Jones

Baby

I got it bad

And only you can

Put a stop to the love Jones

Baby

Let me enter your life

Put out the fire of desire

Send the Love Jones packing

And let me make sweat love to you

Oh, Love Jones

Go away

Let me be in peace

Love Jones

Leave me be

Baby

I got the love Jones

For you

Can't you see?

What you do to me?

I got the Love Jones

Baby and it ain't going away

Until I get to make love to you

Then perhaps this Love Jones

Will leave me be

Love Jones

April 15 Kim Vs. Trump Twitter War -in memorial of Kim Il Sung’s the Great Leader’s Birthday

President Kim, it is time that we cut the shit and cut a deal #Real Trump

President Trump, it is impossible for us to cut a deal unless you agree to me keeping nukes # Kim Jong-un the Great

President Kim, you know that if I want I can just make you disappear. You can be wiped off the earth in a moment. We know where you live #real Trump

President Trump, we have a nuke with your name on it on a boat sailing up the Potomac and it will blow your ass up any day now so don’t fuck with us. #Kim Jong-un the Great

Kim, your stupid Asian gook. Let me break it down for yah You threaten the US you die and all the North Koreans go to hell. Is it worth it? #real Trump.

Trump, you are so stupid. You are the worst excuse for a human being ever $ Kim Jong-un the Great

Kim, you are the stupid mother fucker. I mean what’s up with that idiot haircut of yours? $real Trump

Trump I would not talk about hair, you orange haired mutant mother fucker. #Kim Jong-un the Great

Kim, it is all real baby and so are my wife’s boobs… #real Trump

Trump, let’s cut the crap and get down to business. How much will you pay us to get rid of the nukes? #kimJongun the Great

Kim, lets meet manor a mano and get it out on the table. No nukes no chems no bioweapons and no more political prisoners to start with #realTrump

Trump, we can discuss. If I can stay in power the rest is negotiable #Kim Jong un the great

Finally, the two of you are talking sense. About time #Xi the President of China

April 16 Why I am not a Christian Easter Thoughts

On Easter Sunday, I often think about Christianity

I don’t understand why anymore would believe such nonsense

The essential story makes no sense

An imaginary all powerful deity that no one has ever seen or heard

Except for psychotic patients or Drug users

Comes down to earth and impregnates a married woman

Who has never had sex for some reason

And her husband is okay with that

Believes her wild story

And still does not have sex

Until after the baby is born

Then there is total silence

Nothing about Jesus’s childhood

30 years later he emerges

Preaching love, peace and brotherhood

And denouncing the corrupt temple leaders

And the Jewish leaders as well

The miracles also don’t make any sense

In the real world, you can’t turn fish into bread

Can’t walk on water

Can raise the dead etc. etc.

Just does not happen

In the world, we live in

And has not happen since those ancient days

Then the last supper makes some sense

Jesus knows he is about to be betrayed

But he does not confront Judas

Does not run away

Does not encourage his disciplines

To run away with him

The whole Jesus Mary M story

Also, does not make sense

Jesus must have been married

Or he was gay

There is no doubt

Either way the story makes no sense

The crucifixion is the only part of the story I buy

Jesus was put to death because he was a rebel leader

And the Romans tolerated no dissent

To the Roman’s right to conquer and rule

The rising from the dead stories

All contradict one another

And Jesus was either walking as a normal human being

Or was a ghost

The door was rent open as if by lightening

Or not

Finally, we have been waiting over 2,000 years for his return

You would think if the story is remotely true

He would have turned up by now

Except he has

As many lunatics claim to be Jesus

in the flesh

all delusional of course

and that is what I think of Christianity

nothing but fairy tales and mass delusions

surrounding a kernel of truth

Love one again

Treat each other right

Don’t be consumed with greed

But couldn’t that message

Be made simpler

Without all the associated nonsense?

So, on this day I say

Open your minds

And discard the nonsensical elements of Christian thought

And follow the true teachings of Jesus

Even if you don’t believe in the imaginary man in the sky

April 18 Spring Time in Oregon

Spring has finally sprung in Oregon

Escaping from the longer winter prison

That has covered the land with snow

They say that this winter

Was a colder than normal winter

Wetter than normal

As the long drought finally ended

As nature resumed its normal spring thaw

I rejoice

Seeing all the signs of spring

Especially the sight of young beautiful women

Shedding their winter clothes

And walking about in the spring sunshine

So wonderfully alive

So, beautiful and sexy

As they sashay about

Here and there

It makes me smile

All day long

Yes, I love Spring time

Everywhere in the world

But especially in Oregon

My new found second home

April 19 Cats

Cats

I often wonder about Cats

What do they think of us

It seems at time

That cats think of humans

As their slaves

We exist to feed them

To comfort them

To save them from their enemies

And to worship them

Yes, cats are an alien species

Totally different from humanity

Detached, and almost evil

If we ever encounter an alien civilization

God help us if it’s a cat based civilization

We would then be engaged

In the epic mother of all wars

As cats and humans would not get along

The cats would think we were their slaves

And we would resent and fear them

And secretly worship their alien ways

April 20 Secret Agency Man

Secret agent man

Where are you going?

What do you know?

And when did you know it?

What dark secrets do you hide

In your inner soul?

Do you even have a soul anymore?

Or has it been so compromised

That there is nothing left?

But lies, within lies with lies

Do you even know the truth?

Does the truth set you free?

Or is the truth just another lie?

That you tell yourself

I’d like to know

My secret agent man

Perhaps someday you well tell me

Your deepest darkest secrets

And reveal what the government is hiding

But perhaps I can’t handle the truth

So, keep you secrets to yourself

And let them die with you

As you go to your grave

Your secrets buried deep within

Your corrupted soul

Until the end of time

Reveals all

April 21 COSTCO People Watching

I love my COSTCO

I love going there to shop

But most importantly

I love people watching

Looking at people as they walk by

Wondering what their stories are

And covertly checking out the beautiful girls

As they walk on by

And when they smile at me

It makes my day

Yes, I love my COSTCO

And COSTCO Loves Me back

Extracting my money

From my wallet

I go in for one simple thing

And walk out having spent 500 dollars

Yes, COSTCO has my number

And loves me too

Long Live COSTCO

April 22 The Dogs of War are Howling

The Dogs of War

Have been set free

Of their cage

And are out

Howling at the moon

The Dogs of War

Have been set free

To wreck what havoc

Might be

Yes, the Dogs of War

The Hell Hounds

Have bound out of their cages

Sniffed about

And smiled

At the destruction, they saw

They knew soon

They would be in their element

As the world descends into chaos

The Dogs of war

Are at foot

The chaos is upon us

The evil grows and grows

And dark noises are heard

Here and there

And the dogs of war

Smiled

They knew soon

They would be in their element

The war machine

Came to life

The plans came out of the books

The military might be unleashed

And the Dogs of war

Smiled and howled at the moon

And the rest of the world

Shuddered

At the thought of what was yet to be

Satan on the other hand

Was happy as can be

With the evil shit

That was going down

He smiled

Patted his hell hounds

And told his dogs

The war to end all wars

Armageddon is upon us my friend

Soon, mankind will know

The face of absolute evil

And they will love it

When I take over

The armies prepare

The bombers prepare

And the dogs of war

Are happy

Unleashed to do their mischief

And soon millions may die

And the pits of hell

Will open

And the judgement day

May be upon us all

Madness descends upon the land

The fog of hate envelops us all

And reason and civilization

Fall away

As the Dogs of War

And their minions

Take over the minds of man

And the end of the world

And the beginning of the end times

Come upon us all

The usual lies descend upon the world

Kim Jong un is evil personified

He must be destroyed over there

Before he can destroy us over here

The lies continue unabated

And Kim plays along

With each day unleashing another threat

With Trump and his minions

Responding in time

Saying the time for talk is over

The time for robust action is here

The machinery of war

Once unleashed

Can't easily be stopped

There is a certain cruel logic

That demands that the war go on

And people die

And people suffer

And the US goes bankrupt

Morally and fiscally

And the evil that men do

Goes on and on and on

But the war machine must be fed

The munitions makers must be paid

As each million-dollar missile is launched

Millions more are made

And the corporations

Think of the endless profits

To be made

Every time they kill

With the war machines

But who cares about the victims

They are nothing but collateral damage

Who cares about the soldiers

Nothing but cannon fodder

Who gives a damn

About the dead

They are dead and gone

Just think about the profits

Think about the profits

Satan is happy

The dogs of war are free at last

April 23 Suburban Laundromat – thanks to Don Teeter for the inspiration from a FB posting

Suburban Laundromat Scenes

Suburban laundromat

Anywhere USA

I often go to a suburban laundromat

Near my suburban apartment

I can sit in my car

Listen to jazz, classical or blues

On my car’s radio

And watch my machine

Doing its suburban laundry duty

Just spinning and spinning and cleaning

Doing its thing its laundry thing

The neighborhood is anywhere USA

Strip malls, apartment houses, townhouses

A fire station, a police station

Banks, cell phone shops

Restaurants from around the world

At the parking lot’s edge

As I approach I notice

Gentlemen of the off-grid class

Sitting among their Hogs

Stoned off the semi legal weed

Smiling at me

With an I don’t give a fuck attitude

That is somewhat contagious

They tell stories

Paranoid ramblings

Containing a kernel of truth

As they watch their clothes

Like a hawk

The clothes spin and spin and spin

As the laundry machine does its laundry thing

The machines don’t care about what we humans think

They just do their duty as the man says

Across the old run down boulevard

The light rail line uses a right of way

That dates to the mid 1850’s

An old Indian game trail perhaps

That the white man turned into the first road

In these parts

People come and go

Some in cars

Some on foot

People from all over the world

Speaking languages from everywhere

But all understand English to some extent

And many understand Spanish to some extent

I feel everyone is united

Chiefly by their transience

And think back on old Latin saying

Sic transit Gloria mundi

And wonder if these are the end days

And ask the laundry machine

What does it think

The laundry machine pauses

Seems to think

And looks at me

Almost saying

WTF do you think

A laundry machine knows?

And so, I gather my items

Nod to the regulars

Who interrupt their endless paranoid arguments

Acknowledging my existence

And I stumble back

To my suburban apartment

Truly paradise on earth

April 24 I Want You Right Now

I still want you

More than anything else in life

I want you

I want you next to me

I want you every moment

Of every minute

Of every day

I need you in my life

I need your wisdom

I need your kindness

I need your beauty

I need your special wit

And I need your ability

To deal with this cruel world

I need you to save me

From the demons

That haunt my Soul

For you are my soul mate

The only person

Whoever completed me

And made life worth living

April 25 The Decline of America

You see it everywhere

The unmistakable signs

That the decline of America

Is in full swing

And we have gone past the tipping point

There is nowhere left to go

But downward

As the Empire begins to collapse

Victim of imperial overreach

Like all empires before

The DC metro on a good day

Is a broken-down remnant

Of a once proud system

The future of mass transit

Its proponents said

The interstate highway system

Is falling apart day by day

The cost of rebuilding America mounts

And our politicians are afraid

That it will costs trillions of dollars

Just to prevent the US from collapsing

Into third world irrelevance

We have the world’s most expensive military

A million dollars per missile

And yet we can’t find the money

To provide decent health care for all

Bombs, and tax cuts for the wealthy

Are the only things

That the Republicans care about

And the world looks in amazement

At the clown boy President

As he struts about

Looking more and more

Like some Banana Republic

President for life

With his family grabbing as much loot

As they can

From the federal government

Before the coming revolution

Overthrows them

When did we start this decline?

Some say 1960s started it

Others say Nixon’s to blame

Others claim that it was Carter’s fault

Or Saint Reagan’s fault

Or the other boy President GW Bush

Or Obama the fake American’s fault

Does it really matter

All I know

Is the America I knew

The can do anything country

Is alas no more

And I morn for our lost liberties

Our lost sense of purpose

Our lost sense that America

Was the last great hope of Mankind

And still I wonder

Can America be made great again?

As our President Trump proclaims

The end times approaches

Nuclear war is talked about

Another missile crisis

And instead of JFK leading the country

We have Donald John Trump

The one and only

The greatest con man

To ever get elected

And I fear the end is in sight

As America begins its decline

Will we be one country

Or will we erupt into a civil war

The right claims that the left has started it

And the left claims that the right has started it

And both sides claim that the civil war

Is inevitable

A fight for the future of our country

And so, it goes

The decline of empires

And I pray

That I may survive

The end of times

April 27 Life is Wonderful

This morning I woke up

Always a good thing

At age 61

I looked out my window

And saw a bright blue sky

Nice Spring time weather

Not a frown in the sky

Not a cloud to hide

The bright late April Sun

I looked over

And saw her there

As always

The nighttime anxieties fade away

And I realize once again

Everything will be okay

If she is with me

And I said to myself

What a wonderful day

April 28 Sandwich Choices

There are so many choices to be had

When ordering a sandwich

What kind of bread

What kind of meat or any meat

What kind of cheese or any cheese

Whether to have sprouts or not

Whether to have a pickle or not

Whether to go with a classic peanut butter

And something sandwich

I loved peanut butter sandwiches

As a kid

Peanut butter and sweat pickles were my favorite

Peanut butter and banana is good also

Peanut butter and strawberry jam

What a delightful memory

My current favorite

Is a BLT with sprouts, avocado, and kosher dill pickles?

Heirloom red tomatoes one slice per each half

Avocado one half per each half

One half pickle on each half

Bacon cooked just right – well done but not black

Sprouts and lettuce just right

Timamook Yellow smoked cheder cheese

On each half

On Gluten Free bread

with chipotle mayo

And Dijon mustard

Cut in half

Truly a sandwich made in heaven

And bacon makes everything

Taste so damn nice

And God if you are reading this poem

You had better prepare them for me

Or Heaven will not be worth it

Does Satan serve BLT sandwiches

I wonder

Probably not

Probably you become the bacon

In his hell sandwiches

April 29 More Coffee Blues

One morning as I drank my fake coffee

I needed to go out and get a cup of real coffee

The fake coffee just did not do the trick

It tasted almost like the real thing

But just did not have that kick

And I needed it bad

I needed the real coffee buzz

I realized that I was a coffee addict

I tried to just drink decafe

But was boring

And almost as bad as the fake coffee

That I drank

Caffeine was bad for me

I knew it

But I craved the rush

Craved the intense buzz

Craved the hyperactivity

Kept me all day

And caused me nightmares

Sometimes for days on end

I knew I could not handle it

But like all addicts

I needed my coffee buzz

And so, I once more

Drank my drug of choice

And entered the coffee zone

As I fried my brain

With caffeine

The last legal drug

In neo-puritan America

And I smiled as I gave in

To the intoxicating smell

And flavor of my coffee

And surrender my free will

And drank my coffee

Waiting for the nightmares to come

April 30 Rambling Man -Where Do I Belong?

I have been a rambling man

All my adult life

Grew up in Berkeley, California

Went to College in Hayward and Oberlin

During my lost year

Lost in a fog of booze and pot

Then I came back to reality

And went to college

In Stockton, California

The central Valley

Ohio transplanted to California

Then after four years in Stockton

With extended weekends

and breaks in Berkeley

I became an expatriate wanderer

Peace Corps worker in Korea

Then taught ESL in Korea

For four years

Occasionally returning to my home

But always wanting to be elsewhere

Then back to Korea

And then Seattle for four years

Driving back and forth to the bay area

Stopping off in Southern Oregon

Eventually bought a house and duplex

In Southern Oregon

Vaguely thinking we would retire there

Some day when my rambling ways were over

Then back to Korea for three more years

Then I joined the Foreign service

And my wife the military

And I wandered the world again

Always somewhere

Always dreaming of my next somewhere

Never there

As I was a permanent expat

And a diplomat to boot

Never a local

But never really felt I belong there

Or in the America

That was becoming more and more

A foreign land

The longer I stayed away

I stayed on in DC for almost ten years

Off and on

But never really felt that I belong there

I was too West Coast in my heart

And DC seemed to be

Just a place to stay

In between travels

Stayed in Thailand

Then later India

And Eastern Caribbean

And later Spain

Traveled to 45 countries

Lived in ten

And now I am retired

Still torn between

living the expat life

In Seoul, Korea

And returning to the West Coast

And occasionally back to DC
and Florida as well

And I wonder

Where do I belong

Other than wherever

My wife and I end up

Neither here nor there

Half way there

And so is that my fate

Never to really belong

Never to have roots in the ground

Always wanting to be somewhere else

Always a stranger in my native land

And a stranger in my other home

Across the sea

There is no answer to these questions

As the rambling urge comes again

And I prepare to move yet again