Semi-Empathetic
Kokoda Trail
Mechanical, rhythmic,
Fully Automatic.
Signals and synapses,
Following the static.
Holed up thoughts,
In a holed up life.
The jungle blooms in the blood,
Where the Aussies laid sill, died.
And the brutality became interest,
When the speaker heard white noise.
Of echoes in the distance,
Gunshots cracking, splintering his voice.
And they kicked up the daisies.
As footsteps trudge through soiled mud
That was littered with landmines
And shell casings from onslaughts "won"
The Japs. And the disease.
The rats. And the fleas.
The fight. For everyone
The war. That came to our front door.
In a faraway place,
We fought for our nation.
The risk of invasion.
We took a stand
For generations to come.
I would have done the same.
The Fish of the Sea
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Comments
Another powerful write! your friend!....Jim
Awww thanks so much Jim ironically, it was only till the last draft that I came up with the theme. Hope its not too obvious... always love your comments. Thanks again, your poetic friend, Max
Hey man,
So glad I popped on for a few......sometimes I don't feel well (my disease) and so I can't be on here for days at a time.....but I'm glad I decided to visit for a few moments this evening because this poem is revealing in a few ways that help my curiosity about the man behind the name.....You're from Australia or did I surmise incorrectly?...also, your name is Max.....and your heart is as broad as your curiosity.....ALWAYS a good combination for a writer......when conveying the particulars of war it is not easy to convey the essence of the brutality of it.....but you delivered some outstanding phrasing here that captures some the ugliness.......ALL STARS!!....well done FISH!!.....it's a pleasure to watch your progress as a writer/conveyer of truth!!......well penned dear poet brother!!......LOVE & ROCKETS!!....T xo : )
Wow Tony, I feel so honored that you decided to look at my poetry in your fleeting time to look at the site. Means so much. Yes, I'm from Aus, Lol, my account says Hobart, but that's just to keep people quiet hehe... Also same with my name, somthing that my parents nearly gave me. Gotta stay a but anonymous, cause if I was found out on this site wouldnt here the end of it. Thank you so much for your kind words, I think we are all learning on here. Kudos to you inspiring poet. Peace and smiles. Your friend, FISH
Awesome write! Great job, I just got on for a few minutes and aren't I glad I did. I can feel the flow in it, all the emotions and rhythm. Great write!
Wow thanks so much Bell! It means a lot for you to comment on my work. Kudos to you my friend, hope to read some of your work too also. Peace and smiles. TFOTSÂ