She Shouldn't Be Wearing White

I'm your best man and what I'm going to say may start a fight.
But your intended has a lot of nerve because she's wearing white.
Your bride to be has been with me and every guy on the block.
You just punched me and hit me on the head with a large rock.
I think you've fractured my skull and I'm about to lose consciousness.
But she's a big fat phony because she's wearing a white wedding dress.
She has been with so many men that I don't remember the exact amount.
She has been with so many men that I've lost count.
I need medical attention because I'm about to fall to the floor.
But your bride to be gives new meaning to the word whore.
She has been with way too many men and when she speaks, she talks like Elmer Fudd.
Please call 911 because hitting me with that rock is causing me to lose a lot of blood.
I know that you're irritated and you would've preferred it if I had kept my big fat mouth shut.
But she needs speech therapy and she shouldn't be wearing white because she's a slut.