Stud Muffin

I sometimes numb my feelings with alcohol, drugs, food,
         sex, television or work.
 
While I fear relationships,  I continually seek them.
 
I feel empty and incomplete when I am alone.
 
My fear and shame cause me to feel “less than.”
 
I become attached to people without knowing them.
 
I use romantic attachments to escape feelings of anxiety,
       loneliness, anger, self-hatred as well as joy.
 
Fearing abandonment and loneliness, 
     I stay and return to destructive relationships.
 
I seek others approval often to the point of abandoning my
     own needs and desires.
 
I sometimes isolate from family and friends.
 
I am distracted by obsession and fantasy.
 
I  involve myself in one relationship after another.
 
I confuse sexual attraction with love.  I confuse love with
      pity, and the need to rescue or be rescued.
 
I use sex or emotional dependence as substitutes
     for nurture, care and support.
 
I attach myself to people who are emotionally unavailable.
 
I am enslaved to emotional dependency and
      romantic intrigue.
 
I assign magical qualities to others, idealize them and
        then blame them for not meeting my expectations.
 
When I get the love of another, it does not seem to be enough