The Thoughtless Father

I woke to the sound of my alarm clock on March 11th
It it was my father's birthday...
I haven't spoken to that selfish man for a few years now
not by my own choice, but by his thoughtlessness
and his want for me to not even exist 

I choke back my tears and started my morning routine
Sure, I wanted to message him,
but I already knew he wouldn't respond
Who knows, he might have blocked my number when I sent him that very first text

I could probably count the number of times I've met my father on one hand
I can count the number of times my father ever told me happy birthday because I wouldn't have to even lift one finger

I often wonder why he didn't want me
He wasn't even there when I was born
It's like he hated me before he ever met me
Now now I'm just left with my piercings, depression, and my O.D.D thanks to my "daddy issues"

He probably doesn't even care about what he's done to me,
if he even thinks about me at all
If he would even realize at all

But I'll be just fine
I've gone through 17 years without him
I've learned so many things without him
I've grown to be an intelligent young woman without him
So why would I need him now?