There Is No God

There Is No God.

I descended a staircase
Made of razor blade cotton
With barbed wire railing
And wood that was rotton 

It lead to to a treaure
Of immesurable worth
Cradled safely within
The cold womb of the earth

I walked down the stairs
To the door at the bottom
As though plans never realized
Were never forgotton  

I said "Paul never died..."
And the door opened wide
An emotional avalanche
Thundered inside  

I knew this house well
I for I'd stalked every floor
What's been carved on my heart
Lies behind that great door.  

MY PAUL! 

The past never happened,
The future, unclear
Only now, now now, now
And the one I hold dear

I fly 'cross the threshold
Sure enough, there you are
In a chair with your back to me
Playing guitar 

Oh, I love you so much!
I've missed you so long!
You are slipping away
Though I try to hold on  

I long for your touch
You turn then, to face me
So real, so ALIVE!
You reach out to embrace me  

Your eyes are so blue
I can still feel your breath
You were always so handsome....
Even in death  

Then the edges get fuzzy
The scene fades away
Time warps wobbles and stops
for a hospital stay 

Hope springs eternal
Winter snow swiftly falling
Your candle still flickers
My children keep calling

But I gave it to God
I was sure all along
Nurses sent masked as angels
Would right this great wrong

Did you hear me, my Paul?
As you slept like a stone?
I will love you forever
Dont leave me alone!  

"He might", joked the nurse
"Head for Hollywood!"
If he survives....
And they hoped that you would....

 They looked at you warmly
Said. "Such a brave fellow"
And gently they tended you
Your tears were bright yellow  

Sometimes you slept...
And could not cry at all
Oh God, please dont take him!
Don't take my Paul!!!

I have funny stories to tell you
About your hospital stay
We can laugh all about this
On the beach where we lay  

We had plans for the Summer
To lie in the sand
On the beach on Long Island
A guitar in your hand  

Your beautiful hands
I held them each day
I never let go!
But you still slipped away.

I said "Please God, Please God
Please God please!
Dont let him die
From this fucking disease!  

There is no God.