Why my baby sister

My dearest sister I decided to finally write your poem 
My God it hurts so deep not being able to read it to you on the phone
Since you took your heavenly flight I've become
Someone I no longer know
No matter how I try to hide my sadness it will 
Forever show
Never did I imagine my life without you
But this reality leaves me lost not knowing what to do
I remember the good times and even they make
Me cry
I'm still waiting for an answer from God as to why
someone as precious as you had to die
I sit in silence alot now I have an agenda behind 
That choice
I've convinced myself if the world is quiet I
Will hear your sweet voice
So many questions but the the answers are
Never found
All I have is the agony of laying by baby sister
In the ground
I miss you big mama so freaking bad
Never hurt this much and we lost mom
And dad
But you were there though to help me like
You always did
My hero ever since I was a kid
Me and mary try to help each other but she's
Just as lost as me
Guess misery really does need company
Regina Brown you can't even imagine the hearts
You broke
You were always a comedian so can you pop up
And say haha it was just a joke
Wishful thinking I have been doing that alot
It's heartbreaking that the memories are now all
I got
Im angry sissy I wanted you always there
Not mad at you just full of so much despair
I dread the mornings now because reality is not where I want to be
I long for bedtime so I can dream your here with me
So young so beautiful so special in every way
I know God needed another angel and he wanted the best
He saw you were tired and he gave you rest
Those are words of comfort but it's not helping
Me much
I want my baby sister your smile your laughter
To once again feel your touch
I'm not being selfish it's heartbreak
I don't understand why it's you he chose to take 
Your daughter turned twelve yesterday I know you smiled down on her from Heaven
I don't understand why she lost her mother at only eleven
Sister I'm sorry I'm not rejoicing I have no reason to celebrate
All I have is yesterday until the day I meet my
Fate
I pray I'm as blessed to make it where you are
That's when I will celebrate when I'm reunited 
With my star
Shine bright like a diamond tell Emily she better learn to dance because she owes me one
Tell baby em aunt Leah owes her lots of fun
Tell my paw paw I remember my prayers every night
Even though I'm a crazy girl let mama know 
I turned out alright
Tell my daddy I love him
And as for you I miss my best friend
I will see you one sweet day that's the
Best I can hope for 
Lord willing I will meet you on that beautiful shore