Wishing instead

it's her or me,
I know  you  will  choose  her,
Even though  she talks bad about me,
Mother I wish  it was me,
Wish  he would choose me,
But I'm not  good enough,
I try to be  perfect, 
I'm just a child  in  his eyes
But I'm not,
he's going to leave me, behind,
Can I believe  that you  choose me  instead?
Can I believe  in you?  without hurting  myself,
You abused  me physically and mentally,
Can I trust  you  not to hurt me again,
I guess not
Why aren't I good enough for you,
Goodbye I don't  want you
It's those words that scare me  the most
I'm sorry daddy  that  I'm just me.