The hammock

I was chilling in the bar the other day as you do,
before I travelled to The Far East out in the blue,
the lady behind the bar asked me to bring a hammock,
I kept it quiet in case someone felt like having a mock.

You have visions - there was a guy strung between two trees,
three months would you believe looking at tranquil seas,
his partner was not 'quite right,' he needed some 'ease,'
alright  for some, why can't I stay a longer time please.

We met two artists on the beach selling work to hotels,
things people do, I suppose it's a living - anything that sells;
the lady thought we were an interesting couple, gave man a call,
he soon disappeared, seemed to think not charismatic at all!

I returned home to pub banter - 'Are you alright my old cock?'
told the lady's partner,' didn't manage,' he said: 'What hammock?'