Bottling it up

Bitter, angry throwing your energy around
People on pins, you can hear no sound
Just the roar of uncomfortableness and awkward blinks
Nodbody speaking,  scared to say what they think
Your mood fills a room and takes others smiles away 
Your bad day is now there's but nothing no one can say 
They creep around with short hellos and dodge interaction 
You can't help it, you can't brake free you need a massive distraction 
The drink will do to take away the blue
It just makes it worse 
A vicious cycle can't jump off, the devils blood in your veins, a curse 
Pushing loved ones away, one thing on your mind to numb the feeling strong 
You can't break free it makes you weak you no how this is wrong 
Guilt and hurt you feel but so do they because of decisions made
You hide away, can't bare the truth in the shadows there you fade 
It's begins again to numb the pain thinking what have I become 
Once a loving person happy and free
A friend, a brother a son