Poem -
THE BUTTERFLY GIRL
Her silence echoes throughout....
Shadowed footsteps filter her path
Tiptoe whispers caught by the wind
Caution to those who may have sinned
Beckoning all with her mantis display
Butterfly wings then show the true way
Betray the girl....
The seeker of souls
Pray your not the next one she calls
Upon her pedestal she awaits...
Those who chose to seal their fate
Foolish presumptions leading the blind
To the butterfly's lair
The last of her kind...
An eternal child of the immortal land
The seeker of truth's
With butterfly hands
Eradicates the corrupt
Left with no legs to stand
Forever thy dwell within her abode
Fly evermore in her tumultuous world....
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Comments
Carey Milton
Good write, Thanks for sharing
Regards & Love
WILLIAMSJI MAVELI
Perfection Carey
5*s from me:)
Maddison
Thanks for reading Maddison and Willy :)...I just wrote this in like 10 minutes lol...but every word just fell off my pen...Glad you enjoyed as much as I did writing this! xx
Cool write Carey, sometimes my better writes happen in ten minutes, good flow and story hun, big vote and Nom from me :)
Weeee. lol. Thanks mate!...Enjoyed writing this...thought I had some sorta writers block...Then knock on wood and Voila! lol Cheers Jase for ya nom :)
Btw...Loved your little write back at Tracys poem...Clash of the Titans!!..Nomed and voted too :)
Congrats on your winning nomination dear Carey Milton
Regards & Love
WILLIAMSJI
SIMPLY LOVELY CAREY X 5 FROM ME HON X
How do I vote im new here and this was the first poem ive read and its super and if you could read mines please tell me what you think
Simply Perfect write Carey ,no grid to measure your talent.I love the little girls eyes and little wings along with the poem..
Love
piusha..
Carey, outstanding write, well done on your nom, well deserved
Regards Mark.x
Thanks everyone!!..Always appreciate your taking time out to read my work..:)x
Thanks so much Merrill.! Your comments are highly regarded :) x
Loved this one Carey! This is quite different to what your usual write, and I don't just mean subject matter, it has a slightly different feel to it. Although it did have a rhyming scheme, it didn't feel the driving force behind it, which I liked from you. All the way through this write although there was a darkness, sort of foreboding with her; there was also a sadness, a loneliness which you depicted beautifully. Loved the story you told! A vote and nom from me too:)
Would love to see you do a 'prose' (don't ask Jasons' opinion on that one ha ha!). Just to see you write your way through an emotion or a time or place you can pinpoint. I think you would create a really emotive piece Carey.
Rachel...Thanks for taking the time to read this and giving your honest feedback...I do love writing a story ' 'behind the poem' and I am glad to hear that you can differentiate between my styles/subject matter...Thus the reason I asked you to give me your opinion :)...I'm gonna do a little research on some different types of poetry to give my active little mind a new challenge :)
Cheers for your sincere feedback...means a lot :) x
Your writing is brilliant Carey, and I don't want you thinking that I suggest you change your style, rhyming is really hard to do WELL! Like you say a challenge is as good as a rest, and like you I have a an active writing mind, so any suggestions would be welcome LOL!! Always glad to give feedback .... what you want to do with it is another matter ha ha. Cheers hun:)
I loved the lines "The seeker of truth's, With butterfly hands" beautiful :)
Helen...You have pinpointed my very favourite line ...With butterfly hands!...Thank you sincerely for commenting and taking time to read my work..means a lot. :) x