Poem -
Entwined
Joining into the much cascading tide,
A deep-set kiss under saccharine stars.
Such new-found release of immense divide,
Over tending deep ache from sunless scars.
Now glimpse the summertime in fragrant june
Beseech awe-inspiring mortal conveyed.
Ripple ever under, white evening moon
Oxidising sweet aromas true shade.
Welcome arching arms in such full embrace,
Nuzzling in light the grey stony ground.
Lightest fingers softly on skin will trace,
Overt devotion, of being re-crowned.
Virtue all to become reality
Entwined now and always, with clarity
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Comments
Well...
You already know that I think this is your finest work to date. And not just because of the subtle mingling of two distinct forms.
Your command of language and handling of the imagery and continuing willingness to challenge and stretch yourself are a genuine pleasure to watch.
I love this piece ... you know I do.
J XxXxXxXx
Thanks Jason, I'm very glad you enjoyed it
I love your poetry too..I wrote this as a little thank you and in some small way show you what you mean to me....
Lorna xxxxx
Hi Lorna A beautiful love sonnet. Great imagery
bringing the picture you choose to life
Great write
Best wishes Debs xx
thanks Debs,
I'm really glad you enjoyed this
Lorna
xx
Sublime composition which carries the reader forward into intense feelings, using phrasing of true craft ! The building of emotion through the work leads to a fulfilling conclusion. A poem of substance showing how much you have to give using this medium !!
Warmest wishes as always.
Take care. xxx
:)
Thank you Richard, I really appreciate your feedback and kind words
Lorna xxx
Thanks for sharing your craft !
Wishing you all the best. xo
:)
:) x
:)
Contented to find and read what is written here Lorna and written so well.
A beautiful write with words and phrases that lovingly leap off the page.
Like timeless old school poetry sonnet brought to life and so vividly.
Captivating imagery and rhyme and you keep to the 19 syllable golden rule as well and never pad it.
Superbly crafted and your imagination is breathless prose reading.
One that should be published for a wider audience to enjoy.
Five stars but wish it could be many more.
Thanking you kindly for sharing and hang in there my friend.
All good things to you and be seeing your good self and reading more tomorrow :) xx.
Thanks Shaun,
I appreciate your very kind words...this was one of my first sonnets that was in iambic pentameter, but looking at it now, I do feel like I padded it out...its funny when you haven't seen somthing for such a long time you can kind of give yourself the feedback that you couldn't see then ...does that make sence?? It does in my head
Im off to get some sleep, so I will check out more tomorrow
:) x