From So Far

I am always me From day one till the end of time. No one accuses me of not being who they thought when we met or suddenly changing. I don't hide who I am. Good or bad. Flaws or assets. Strengths or weaknesses. It's all right here. It may as well be written on my shirt. Still... I'm always the greatest... Until I'm not. I'm always a blessing when I am needed. Because I so soon am not. I'm always a craving Until the taste starts to bitter. I must look so grand from so far down below. I must seem God-like from the depths of such struggle and strife. I must seem mystical, magical, flawless, pristine when you are stuck in the muck of the swamp disgusted with yourself, disgusted with your life. I must shine like the sun and seem as green as the grass and trees when you feel so dead inside, in the dark on your knees. Do I look immortal and young? A perfect picture of health when your very soul is twisted and sick? What a site I must be. What a site I must be. I must seem so common, so mediocre, no longer so rare, now that you shed those burdens and lifted through the air. I must look familiar, a kindred soul, on this common ground. When we are the only two to ever be here. Where no one else is around. Your eyes show so clearly the thoughts that posses you. Dreaming you can save me, as I did you. Just take my hand and hold on forever, and just rise with me in your arms. Like a string swimming though the air as it follows a lost balloon, but you came to see the ugly truth, regrettably soon. It must have hurt when you first saw it. When the truth I had spoken became clear in your sight. I'm sure you vowed to overcome, to find a way to bring me along on your flight. I'm sure you were devastated and distraught when you could see that I had been right. Becoming an irritating distraction now, a responsibility, a burden... You'll soon learn to let go. I must look so small from such brilliant heights. One tiny insect among many, no name, no face, no soul. I must look so wretched, so unclean, immoral, impure from so far beyond your goal. I must look so broken now that your whole. Hardly even a memory now... Fading so fast in your mind. Can you still remember me being, helpful? Loving? Or kind? Do you remember when we held on so tight and you whispered "forever?" Do you still recall those nights, those moments, when we were truly together? I must look like nothing at all From where you stand. Not lost like a grain in the sand, but gone from all that there is, was or ever will be. I must be even less than a thought. Less than absence itself. Less than the empty spaces between. Something you can't see and now, something you never have seen. I don't exist anymore, not at the heights to which you now soar . I am erased, never was, undone, unreal. I am again nothing, negative, nill.