Hairy Hamish & Gladys McTagish

Hamish McTagish was a wild hairy Haggis
He dwelled amongst the hills & glens 
His doting wife was hairy Gladys
She loved to entertain their friends

High up in the Highlands of Scotland
These wild beasties roamed
Their wild, shaggy manes grew down there backs
& Were not often combed

Haggises understood their accent
But visitors didn’t have a clue
No one knew what was meant
By “Had ya weeshed” & “Och aye the noo”

Whilst Mr Hamish walked clockwise
Larger legs were on the right
His shaggy better half was the opposite to him
What a most peculiar sight

So going round in circles
Side-winding up the hills
Everyone watching in amazement
Their movement gave folk thrills

With piggy like snouts & beady eyes
Long strands of unruly mops
A swarm of bugs & bluebottles
Kept warm & cozy in their crops

This rather rare unusual breed
It survived for hundreds of years
But man got a taste for Haggis
It wiped them out & all their peers

Boil Haggis in a bag
Microwave it in a dish
Theres loads available in the shops today
Tho there not alive now, I wish?