HOLDING BACK
I never had a mother to warm my heart
I know I knew a woman who claimed to be my 'mum'
Who tore my world apart
I picture the memories every single day
I feel like these flashbacks will never go away
They haunt me day in day out
I got some sort of help but it never worked
When I used to talk about it
I felt even worse
I felt more and more broken
I guess that's why I just left it unspoken
No kids ever taught how cope without there mum
No one would ever suspect my mum would just get up one day and run
She would run from her role, she left me captivated in a hole
She made me feel so worthless, so broken and brittle
How could she do that to me
I was so little
I wasn't even 4! I give up trying to fix this pain anymore
5 years I held back my tears
5 whole years I battled with my fears
The thought of you going away again made me feel so sad
I had these moods where I went from happy to mad
Just like that I know my life will never be the same
One thing i'm certain about is that
I was never to blame.
Support CosmoFunnel.com
You can help support the upkeep of CosmoFunnel.com via PayPal.
Comments
Hi  Grace Your poem touched my heart such a sad writeÂ
I found writing such a release from the pain of grief
it really helped so much to write it all down
I hope it will for you tooÂ
Best wishes to you DebsÂ
Â
Hi Grace , It sounds like you had a tough time growing up, your words are very touching and genuine. I hope your in a better place now .Â
KevinÂ
This poem is very touching. I feel so much better knowing that I can relate to someone else. My mother left me when I was a baby. I can totally understand you. Now I'm only in my teens and still ponder this.Â
Blessings to you! ;)
(I can't write seriously without one emoji in my message)
-Ema
Sometimes when we write is releases the pain from within us. Â It's cathartic. Â I hope it helped you even a bit. Â You know what I felt is you emerging into your own woman...knowing it wasn't that you weren't loveable but her inability to know how to love you the way you needed to be.. xo