Poem -

How The Grinch Didn't Steal Christmas

How The Grinch Didn't Steal Christmas

Last year, the Grinch stoleΒ the presents and my Christmas tree.
This year I'm making that green freak pay for what he did to me.
I've been turning the Grinch every way but loose.
What I'm doing would shock even DR. Seuss.
When he opened my door, his head got burned by a blowtorch.
Now his head has third degree burns because it is scorched.
I put a plank on the floor with nails sticking out.
He just stepped on those nails and the entire neighborhood can hear him shout.
If you could hear his naughty language, this poem would be Rated R.
He's green and furry so he can't be Human, maybe he came from Mars.
I made an iron fall on his head and I'm pelting his head with bricks.
The Grinch is giving up and leaving, he knows when he is licked.
I got myΒ revenge and IΒ got it all on myΒ own.
You may be wondering how I did those things, it's because I'm a fan of Home Alone.

Like 1 Pin it 0
Support CosmoFunnel.com

Support CosmoFunnel.com

You can help support the upkeep of CosmoFunnel.com via PayPal.

Poem -

Goodbye Terence Stamp

Dedicated to Terence Stamp (1938-2025) who died on August 17,...

Goodbye Terence Stamp

He was very talented and he has died at the age of 87.
After living for many years, he died and went...

Poem -

Puppy - Part 3

Dedicated to Puppy (2017 - 2023) who died two years ago today...

Puppy - Part 3

Two years ago, I went into debt to try to save you.
But you passed away anyway, it's sad and it's...

Poem -

William Lanteau

Dedicated to William Lanteau (1922-1993) who died on November 3...

William Lanteau

He was an actor who died at the age of seventy.
William died of complications from heart surgery....

Latest poems in Comedy, Limerick

Poem -

A SINATRA WANNABE

Modelled himself on Sinatra hopeful of success
Copied all his mannerisms the poise and finesse...

Poem -

Malfeasance of my money

Malfeasance of my money

which perpetrators most likely find quite funny

Super bastards and sons of bitches wantonly deceive...

Poem -

When Boredom Truly is...

When Boredom Truly is Underrated

Have you ever been so bored
that you actually find yourself miming
to the lion's roar...

Advertise on CosmoFunnel.com