Poem -

I REMEMBER

I REMEMBER

These are the things that mold and shape you
Like hands; molding clay
You're forever changed, affected
No matter what they say
I REMEMBER crying;
And never being heard
I REMEMBER telling;
But no one heard a word
I REMEMBER people knowing;
And acting like it's okay
I REMEMBER people telling me;
It's just the past, let it go away
But it's forever changed me
I'll never be quite the same
It took away my innocent trust
And for years, I took the blame
It's never been about forgiving
That was done, a long time ago
It's dealing with the aftermath
Unless you've experienced it;
How can you possibly know
I REMEMBER how it changed me
I can't love or trust the same
The victim didn't walk away, unscathed
I'm still dealing with the shame
How am I affected?
I'M NOT THE PERSON I WANTED TO BE
Every moment of every waking day
I struggle with how it's left me
I REMEMBER a happier, innocent time
Before I ever learned how to fear
I REMEMBER looking with eyes of love
Before my trust, learned to disappear
 

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Comments

author
Tony Taylor

Hey GAYLE!!.....this is a VERY powerful and emotion filled write!!......speaking to the devastation of dealing with one who simply ignores or doesn't give you the 'time of day' when you're standing right there!! "I remember telling: but no one heard a word!"....dealing with those who simply choose to pretend as if nothing has happened in the face of major difficulties can be so extreme!! Sweeping the truth under the rug NEVER works!!......VERY compelling piece dear poet sister!!......ALL STARS!!.......well done .......LOVE and ROCKETS!!......T x ?✳✴☀♥

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author
Gayle McMillan

Tony, I just can't express how much I appreciate you responding to this painful piece. I have been trying hard to go on with life, but sometimes you get exhausted and tired of wearing a happy face, and trying to be strong for those around you. Especially if you find you have no one who wants to face that reality with you. Sometimes I just have to express what I have bottled up deep inside.  You are so kind. Thank you!

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author
Tony Taylor

Well remember this dear poet sister, that no matter what happens......I am your cyber-friend and I will always be here..... and if we keep this up we will, one day, come to a place where we can call ourselves "Actual friends!" (smiles)..... but know this, I, and most everyone on Cosmo, WILL always be here when you can't get others to share and speak with ~ and yes! We ARE only cyber-friends BUT, we all have feelings and opinions and THAT, can come in quite handy when the chips are down for you in reality!!...... yours is a VERY clever and engaging mind.... and at times (in your writing) you show flashes of brilliance, so be aware, dear poet sister of mine, even if I'm not on Cosmo that rainy day, there will ALWAYS be someone here for you!!...... be well GAYLE!!..... stay groovy and your inner strength WILL be there for you!!......hugs-n-smiles!!.....your cyber-friend and admirer!!......T xo ?✳✴☀♥

Reply
author
Gayle McMillan

Tony, Thank you for your compassion and encouragement! I want you to know how much it means to me, for you to have taken the time to respond to my comment. Thank you cyber friend! :-)

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author
michael gatward

Beautiful and from the heart as a poem should be
you are never alone as we all are joined 
by a greater force that controls our lives
i believe that's true
we all have our own demons to fight
but together we can be strong and defeat whatever life through sat us

love and kisses
be strong

Reply
author
Gayle McMillan

Thank you for your wise and caring words of encouragement Michael! :-)

Reply
author
unsteady

Thank you for sharing Gayle, I happen to know someone that NEEDS to hear this poem. It takes an extreme amount of strength to admit and face such things, it almost takes a hero to share in order to heal others, we have been blessed.

Reply
author
Gayle McMillan

Thank you unsteady, I posted this poem on facebook and wrote; "Sorry if this upsets anyone, but I don't hide behind pretty smiles, I don't fake it till I make it. This is part of who I am. I won't appologize for keeping it real."
I thank you so much for your empowering words! If I can help someone, and put their pain into words- that reaches out and makes a difference-it's beautiful.
 

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