Silent Eyes
Searching for sweetest grass
The herd moves forward
She moves away
Looking for danger
Sensing nothing
Taking a risk to find satisfaction
Unaware of silent eyes
Losing sight of the herd
Seeing glorious temptation
It's just out of reach
Pressing on
Focused on what's ahead
Mouth watering in anticipation
Inhaling aroma from afar
Β Β Β Β Β Β ****
Eyes of steadfast steel watch in anticipation
A game this deadly beauty likes to play
Inching closer, always unseen
Waiting
In control
Her urges lose reasoning
As blood-lust sets in
A perfect moment
She's in the clearing
Slipping silently from the tall grass
Staying low
Unaware of silent eyes
Focused on what's ahead
Mouth watering in anticipation
Inhaling aroma from afar
Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β ***
Eyes of steadfast steel watch in anticipation
Trigger finger itching
Waiting
In control
He never loses reasoning
Blood-lust bubbling inside
Not from hunger
Only greed
They're in the clearing
He takes a breath
Mouth dry in anticipation
He fires
The Tigress falls
Startled, the antelope freezes
Looking into dimming eyes of the Tigress
Frightened, she runs
He knew she would
A final shot
The antelope falls
He smiles
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Comments
Beautifully and sparsely written.
I love how you build up the elements of the scene; taking the reader from oneΒ pair of eyes to the other: all the while, slowly drawing us into the (narrative) trap.
Fantastic!!
Love you...
your Jason XxXxXxXx
I was hoping the three perspectives wasn't too much
Thank you my love
Your Lorna
xxx
the 'three perspective' was brilliant, Lorna, it really brings home the 'waste' factor and how nature of man is 'greedy' and puts 'nature' out of order....intelligent plotting to emphasize the point, great write....just 'one' request, please don't ever tackleΒ Β 'vegetarianism' with your poetry; I may stop eating meat....you're a powerful poet, maybe too powerful, love the poem, great point as well, cheers Β
Thanks Christopher, Yes that's exactly the point I was making.....I promise to leave vegetables alone (mostly) I have issues with pesticides hahahaha ....But I wont write about them ...yet!!...I'm glad this came across the way I wanted it to.....My intention wasn't to put you off meat, just Β to highlight what what we do as humans.....Im not a vegetarian myself ;)
Thanks for your lovely words
Lorna
Hi Lorna, silent eyes speak louder than words!! Β I remember my mother telling me " look me in the eye "!!Β
only here, there are three sets of eye ## loved reading this ##
by the way, Β we cancelled our flight, we both got ill. Β Just relaxing on the couch. Β
hugsΒ
LeahΒ
Thanks Leah, I'm glad you like this one :D
Its a shame you are poorly and had to cancel your flights. Hope you feel better soon and enjoy relaxing.
Lorna
XX
A Wonderment !
Thank August ;)Β