Writing is easy.

Don't look at me like that! It is!
It is really quite simple when you get down to it.

Forget grammar rules all together.
Punctuation smunctuation! No one will notice your Oxford comma anyways.
An extensive vocabulary only serves to clutter up your writing. 
Don't even get me started on meter and rhyme.

No, writing is very simple.

You simply sit down, and bleed.