COMPASSION

Chapter 17

The Slap

Tommy and Joe Havard make it through Saturday and Sunday without incident and finally, it is now Monday morning and Joe is back at work at Apple Door Company. Everyone offers condolences to Joe but he tells them all he is anxious to get back to work and put the funeral behind him. Joe works as a Customer Service Representative in the sales department with Dennis and Tony two other CSR’ S. He answers the phone and gives information on overhead doors, prices, delivery and enters orders into the
shop for production. 
 
Between phone calls, Joe’s mind starts to wander back to scenes from the funeral, his Mother lying dead on the floor and Tommy’s command not to leave the house alone. He gets through the first day but is still having a hard time focusing on the task at hand
and can’t keep his mind from wandering away. He pulls into the driveway behind the house and notices all the lights are off and the kitchen door is locked with a chain on the inside of the door.
 
“Tommy removes the chain so I can get in,”  Joe shouts.
 
Tommy comes running to the door. “ Sorry I locked the door and put on the chain earlier.” 
 
Joe counters by saying, “ I can see you locking the door but if you put on the chain I can’t get in the house.”   Joe enters the house and heads upstairs to his bedroom to change his clothes. 
 
“Tommy yells to Joe, “I made some chili it’s on the stove.”
 
“Tommy was employed as a food broker-salesman for fifteen years but quit two years ago and has not worked since. Joe sees his clothes laid out on his bed for the next day of work. The brothers are in their late thirties and independent in all aspects of life except for the family money fund. While the sons live at home all paychecks were handed to Mom for keeping.
 
Joe comes downstairs and sits down in the TV room and turns the to the music video channel. Tommy reminds Joe there is chili on the stove.
 
Joe tells his brother, “You don’t have to make me supper I will make my own food. You also do not have to lay my clothes out on my bed for work tomorrow.” 
 
“Why are you watching the music channel it’s for kids,” Tommy remarks.
 
Joe remains silent because he has had this conversation many times before and he knows from past experience he will not prove his point.
 
Tommy asks, “Well if you are not going to eat I want to talk to you about Mom. Tell me again exactly how you found Ma.”
 
Joe tells Tommy, “The clock radio went off at seven. I heard the TV playing loud. I got up walked down to the bottom of the steps turned and saw Mom in her chair.” 
 
Tommy interrupts, “Did you see anything unusual? Was the furniture moved? Where there footprints on the rug? Were there any doors open?”
 
“No. I went over to Ma, shut the TV off, went for a glass of water, could not get Ma up so I ran upstairs and got you. Why are you asking these questions
 
Tommy tells Joe, “I just want to know what you saw. I am going out now so don’t leave the house until I get back.”
 
“Okay,” Joe can’t believe the tension between him and Tommy. It has always been there but without Mom to calm the boys down it has become extremely high. Joe is still desperately searching for temporary diversions to keep his mind from wandering back to the funeral so he flips the TV to the music videos. He watches a new video from Billy Idol titled Rock the Cradle of Love. Finally, something is reaching the walking dead corpse called Joe and he loves the song. Joe is starting to realize he has a huge hole in his soul and from today on he will have to connect with new ideas, new entertainment and most importantly new people. His main and unbreakable connection to his Mother has been broken forever.
 
Joe shuts the TV off and heads to his room and goes to remove the ceiling panel to retrieve his Playboy magazines. He starts flipping through the pages when he hears the door to his room open.
 
“Why do you read those magazines?”  Tommy asks. 
 
“I like looking at the girls,” Joe replies.” 
 
“Do you think you will ever find a girl like the ones in the magazine?”
 
“No!”
 
“Do you think you will ever find any girl?" Tommy asks. “You are a fat slob who sits in his room and jerks off. You are a Fuckin Little Faggot you always have been.”
 
“Thanks for the observation,”  Joe sarcastically replies.
 
“I came back because I forgot my wallet. Remember do not leave the house until I come back. Did you hear me!”
 
“Yes,” Joe replies. Joe tries to go to sleep but in addition to his mind wandering now, he notices he has a tremendous amount of energy.
 
   It is Tuesday now and Joe is back at his desk at work answering the phone and entering orders. Fred his boss has come back from a business trip and offers Joe his condolences.
“Is everything Okay with you Joe? Do you need anything?” Fred asks.
 
“Yes Fred I am fine. Thanks for asking.”
 
“I will let you get back to work.” Fred leaves the office.
 
Joe goes to pour himself some coffee and returns to his desk. He stares at the coffee
as Dennis answers one call after another. Joe’s mind is wandering again and he is not doing his job of answering phones. He finally does take a call and has to get back to the dealer because the information he needs is in a folder in the first-floor file room. He
promises the caller he will get back to him in thirty minutes and hangs up the phone. Joe heads to the file room and enters only to find Roberta the office secretary inside moving file cabinets.
 
Roberta is also in her late thirties but is happily married for the last twenty years and has two children one in college and one ready to graduate high school.
 
Joe walks up to Roberta and asks if there is anything he can do for her.
 
“I have to move these cabinets because there is no room down here to walk but I don’t want you to get in trouble with Fred by not answering the phones,”  Roberta tells Joe.
 
Joe is thrilled to hear the sound of a female voice. He see’s Roberta as an extremely hard working employee, intelligent. dedicated to making the department run as smooth as possible. Grossly underpaid and unappreciated which most women totally understand.
 
Joe has seen this in Roberta from the first day she was hired but he never saw how attractive a woman she is. She has beautiful brown hair, a shapely figure, and a compassionate personality. Joe’s is starting to realize that some women can make you feel great just by being in their presence. He first realized that when he spoke to his
cousin Terry at the viewing and now he is realizing and experiencing the same feelings with Roberta a married woman. Joe desperately needs female medicine but does not know where to get a prescription. 
 
Joe is slowly experiencing symptoms of female energy and estrogen withdrawal. Now that their Mother in gone Joe and Tom will spin out of balance since they lost the female energy that grounded them to the Earth.  No mood stabilizer or pain killer pills will replace the calming effect of a Woman. Without a Grandmother, Mother, Aunt, Wife, Girlfriend or daughter to secrete estrogen and energy into the air the boys Male Energy will rise to an unhealthy level resulting in severe Mental Illness.
 
Joe lies to Roberta because he needs more of her female drug,
“Fred said if I needed to get away from the phones I could.”
 
“Are you sure?” Roberta asks.
 
“Yes let me help you move these cabinets. He spends the next two hours helping Roberta straighten out the cluttered file room. Joe always got pleasure helping his Mother do work around the house. Catherine and Joe actually started installing vinyl siding on her retirement home she purchased five years before her death.
 
 
 The house was a total rehab and as Tommy and Mike framed the inside rooms Catherine and Joe cut and nailed up white vinyl siding on the Havard home. Joe was day dreaming about the remodel job the Havards did on the home as Fred walked into the room.
 
“Joe the phones are ringing off the hook upstairs. Could you go back upstairs and give Dennis and Tony a hand?” Fred asks softly.
 
“Yes, Fred.”
 
“Roberta, why did you not chase him away?” Fred asks Roberta.
 
 “Fred it’s my fault. I completely forgot the time. I am sorry.” 
 
“Roberta I know he likes you and wants to forget about losing his Mother but we need him upstairs. He is such a great worker but I am worried about him. He does not have a girlfriend who can replace his Mother and from what I understand he lives with his older brother who is not working now. That is not a good situation two depressed guys living together. I give them a month before one of them tries to kill the other one.”
 
Roberta is horrified hearing Fred’s observation, “Fred don’t say such a thing!”
 
“You know as well as I do two guys can’t live together especially Brothers.”
 
Friday has finally come and Joe is watching TV sitting in his Mother’s favorite chair. Tommy is coming down the stair getting ready to head out for his nightly drive.
 
“It is your turn to clean the bathroom tomorrow. When I get up I want to see it cleaned,”  Tommy barks at Joe.
 
Joe mutters, “Fuck You.”
   Tommy turns to Joe, “ What did you say?”
 
  “I said I will clean the bathroom I know it is my turn.”
 
 “What did you say before that?”  Tommy demands to know.
 
 “I said, “Fuck You.”
 
 Tom approaches Joe and grabs his neck and raises him out of the chair. “ Say that again!”  Tommy demands.
 
 “Fuck You.”
 
   Tommy slaps Joe on the mouth and shouts, “Say it again!?
 
 “Fuck You!”
 
Tommy slaps harder and Joe starts to bleed from the corner of his mouth. “You say Fuck in Ma’s House! Say it again!”
 
“Fuck You.”
 
Tommy slaps even harder and he tells Joe, “ I can do this all night!”
 
“Fuck You, So can I," Joe replies.
 
Joe is silently praying to God that his brother is successful in choking him to Death. Joe knows Tommy Loves him but he can’t go on without his Mother and sees no reason why he should live in the Nightmare World. Joe senses he will pass out soon and starts to pray inside his Brother completes his Mercy Killing. He thinks he sees his parents in the room crying as they witness the attack. Joe smiles. He will be with them soon.  
 
After a total of ten slaps, Tommy looks into Joe’s eyes and sees a brother who is dead inside. He also knows he is ready to pass out.
 
“You are Fucked up. Mom ruined you by treating you like a baby. I had to do all the hard work all my life. Mike and I saved your ass so many Fuckin times. I should have let the guys beat the shit out of you to wise you up.” 
 
Tommy releases his brother and yells at him, “Clean the Fucking Bathroom!”

 Tom leaves to go out leaving a bleeding Joe who walks to the bathroom mirror and wipes the blood from his mouth. Joe starts to shake and tremble and goes upstairs to bed. He puts his new music tape titled Charmed Life by Billy Idol into his radio and listens to it as he falls off to sleep.  

Tom and Catherine shaken by the level of Violence they have just seen leave the Havard House both in tears.