Poem -

Damn Christmas Bills

My wife makes me put up 3000 Christmas lights at our place.
We have the only house that can be seen from outer space.
When I get my electric bill, I always cuss and holler.
Those damn lights cost me over five hundred dollars.
My wife calls her relatives and they are all long-distance calls.
She doesn't phone just one or two relatives, she phones them all.
My wife sends expensive gifts to her relatives.

I'd like to shoot the person who said it's better to give.
My mother-in-law will get a Rolex watch .
But all that i'll get is a damn pair of socks.
I have to spend a lot of money at Christmas, it's pitiful how much I lose.
If you don't have to spend money at Christmas, I want to be in your shoes .

Like 0 Pin it 0
Support CosmoFunnel.com

Support CosmoFunnel.com

You can help support the upkeep of CosmoFunnel.com via PayPal.

Log in to leave a comment.
Poem -

Polly

Dedicated to Polly Holliday (1937-2025) who died on September 9...

Polly

She starred as a waitress who was always jolly.
She was very talented and her name was Polly....

Poem -

John Brown's 55th...

Dedicated to John W. Brown (1970-2019) who died on June 3, 2019

John Brown's 55th Birthday

Today would've been his birthday but he didn't survive.
If John hadn't died, today he would've...

Poem -

My Wife Became A Carjacker

My Wife Became A Carjacker

My damn wife makes me so mad that I want to smack her.
She turned to crime after she chose to become...

Latest poems in Comedy, Limerick

Poem -

Mine mean Lothario days...

Mine mean Lothario days left me in a confused daze...

as if being a crash test dummy survivor
after a led zeppelin collided with yours truly,
a foo...

Poem -

HELLO TEAM

HELLO TEAM

Close your eyes...

Breathe...

Now open...

Surprise!

If you're saying......

Poem -

Brisk temperatures at dawn...

Brisk temperatures at dawn and dusk herald incipient early Autumn...

here within southeastern
Montgomery County, Pennsylvania,
encompassing quite a geographic...

Advertise on CosmoFunnel.com