Disaster

There's a lot of things I regret in my life,
And I'm still deciding if you're one of them,
I don't know who I'm more disappointed in,
You,
Or myself,
How could I not have seen this coming,
I guess for once I allowed myself to get caught up in the fantasy,
Your fingers in my hair almost as calming as the gentle summers breeze,
It's almost as if you were the sun,
Blinding me from everything sign that I watch for,
I'm ashamed that I gave in so easily,
I know I'm stronger than this,
But you,
You've always been a weakness,
I'm a machine and you're my mechanic,
Oilling me up so I work as you please,
I promised myself I'd never let this happen again,
That I wouldn't give in to you,
Yet somehow the tide was to strong,
I was helpless,
Thrown in different directions unable to control myself,
I was the city and you the hurricane,
Somehow the bitterness of destruction was comforting,
Knowing you still wanted me for something,
Knowing I still crossed your mind,
Even if that ment you never leaving mine