Shattered

Feeling so numb
Don’t know which way to turn
So I turn in on myself
I search my heart
My head is still cloudy
Yet I can’t stop walking through the fog.
I’m searching for something, for love but it does not dwell here.
 
I hurt my daddy
And I don’t know how to fix it
I am sorry I just wanted to feel something..
Anything.
Anything but numb. Anything but lost.
Bring me to life
Because I am dead and I know I don’t deserve you.
 
I don’t even know why you stayed this long
Waiting for someone who doesn’t deserve your love.
Someone who just can’t let go of you.
Someone who is trying to find the truth taking the middle path
And yet the lies are in between two truths
So I’m living a lie.
This is not who I am.

The middle path wasn’t for me-I tried.
But I simply cannot do it alone.
I can do nothing.
I am black as coal.
I am black as night and even death is jealous.
I don’t think my father loves me
So I search for it anywhere I can-I can’t find it in me
Because I know you are the source.
I believe anything I hear
Thrown to and fro
I am not wise
I am a fool.
I don’t know what to do anymore.