She Looks Like The Colonel

I know that beauty is superficial, what's important in a person is what they have internal.
But she makes me think of Kentucky Fried Chicken because she looks like the Colonel.
When people see her, they all think that she founded KFC.
I've tried and tried to get rid of her but she won't dump me.
I even let her catch me in bed with her cousin and her little sis.
When she saw what was happening, she wasn't even pissed.
I broke her arm and she had to wear a cast.
This relationship won't end even though I want to put it in the past.
When I said that I wanted to break it off, she threatened to throw acid in my face.
I want to hire a hitman to take her out because I hate her, our relationship is a disgrace.
She proposed to me and I said no but she wants us to get married and so does her Pa.
He's going to force me to marry her with his shotgun and then he'll be my Father-in-Law.
My life stinks, things are going from bad to worse.
I want somebody to shoot me to end this curse.
You won't see a smile on my face because I feel nothing but gloom.
I'm in a situation that I can't get out of, I'm a man who is doomed.