Poem -

The Duck That Laid Golden Eggs

The Duck That Laid Golden Eggs

(Inspired by 'The Golden Goose' fairytale.)

I have a story about why my ex-girlfriend sucks.
She came to my house and killed my golden duck.
I had a duck that laid a golden egg every day.
She chopped off its head and I made her pay.
When I smelled fried duck, I loved the aroma.
But when I found out it was my duck, I put my ex-girlfriend in a coma.
I shouldn't have hit a woman but she killed my meal ticket and that sucked.
Each one of those eggs that was laid was worth about two thousand bucks.
My duck had laid twenty eggs which was nearly forty grand.
But I could've had so much more, I could've been a rich man.
When she cooked my duck, it caused us to get in a huge fight.
She told me to go f*** myself and I punched out her lights.
My ex-girlfriend ruined everything, I had never before been so enraged.
Because of her, I had to get a job and I'm only earning minimum wage.
 

Like 1 Pin it 0
Support CosmoFunnel.com

Support CosmoFunnel.com

You can help support the upkeep of CosmoFunnel.com via PayPal.

Log in to leave a comment.

Comments

author
Terry Kay

Randy, What can I say? ?????? Terry Kay

Reply
Poem -

R.I.P. Rick Hurst

Dedicated to Rick Hurst (1946-2025) who died on June 26, 2025.

R.I.P. Rick Hurst

He starred in "The Dukes Of Hazzard" and he was a talented man.
He starred as "Deputy Cletus Hogg"...

Poem -

The 30th Anniversary Of...

I graduated from high school 30 years ago today on June 21, 1995

The 30th Anniversary Of Graduating From High School

I dropped out of high school in August of 1986.
In 1993, that was a mistake that I decided to fix....

Poem -

The 40th Anniversary Of...

Dedicated to Ettore Boiardi (1897-1985) who died on June 21,...

The 40th Anniversary Of Chef Boyardee's Death

He was a terrific and skilled Italian chef.
Forty years ago, he took his final breath.
On...

Latest poems in Comedy

Poem -

I sing the praises of...

I sing the praises of Sterilite

(even Mary Poppins would tout
a plug for said company she would spout
forcing playthings...

Poem -

July first two thousand and...

July first two thousand and twenty five...

signals the eighth year we lived
at our present location,
where fringe benefits (a plug) for...

Poem -

ELECTROCUTION OR SHARK

ELECTROCUTION OR SHARK

What would you do?

So many choices...

Imagine if this turned out to be your very last...

Advertise on CosmoFunnel.com