Funny

Who are these faces looking down on me?
I need my time, I need my space, I want my privacy.
...

Last year, I found five million dollars in a briefcase.
The owners want it back, I'm constantly...

I learned that the woman of my dreams isn't a filly.
Just a few nights ago, I learned that she has a...

I watched the worst movie ever made, it truly sucks.
The movie that I'm talking about is Howard the...

Can somebody help me
Please help anyone
I am looking for my Meghan
And I don't know...

I got my butt kicked by a man who has very big muscles.
I was moving in on his girlfriend who is...

I own something that makes my life a living Hell.
I've become a social outcast because I drive an...

When a man said he rode a hog, I thought he was talking about a motorbike.
But he actually rode a...

When I got a job, the boss didn't tell me what he would pay.
That low life piece of scum only gave...

I'm a criminal and my name is Doctor Claw.
I'm very mean and I've broken every law.
Most...

Something happened to me that chills me to the bone.
Nobody recognizes me, I think I'm in the...

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall.
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
But he didn't fall deliberately...

Everybody laughs at my wife because she smokes a corn cob pipe.
She doesn't like it when I complain...

In life there are many things that you shouldn’t do,
Like hug a wild bear or box a kangaroo,
...

My wife is even worse than Aunt Bee when she makes pickles.
She gave some to some celebrities and...

When my wife found my pot, she thought it was tea.
And her employer fired her after he made her pee...

chin lightly nested atop
loosely peopled interlaced fingers
supported via multi purpose table...