Funny

When all was said and done,
Tom Willis kicked the crap out of George Jefferson.
George...

Gordon Ramsay decided to pay a visit to Mel's Diner.
When he criticized Mel's food, Mel gave him a...

Some days it's better to stay in bed
Do you ever feel like this friend of mine
when you greet...

My eleven year old son decided to steal my car.
He drove to the theater and sneaked in to watch a...

I'll tell you the reason why my neighbor's head has a big dent.
I mowed his yard and cleaned his...

I have a neighbor who is obnoxious and rude.
For the last 10 years, we've been having a feud....

Some people go through great lengths to try to get someone's attention...

Some will stand on their...

A smile a tide wide as I'm happy, they say I've ants in my pants but I can't see them
I'm the joker...

I'm Popeye the Sailor, I'm sure not Popeye Doyle.
Things went down hill when I married Olive Oyl....

My new Russian bride can only say one english word and that word is no.
If she doesn't start...

Once a year, I deliver presents to children all over the world.
But sometimes I wonder why I do what...

My wife makes me put up 3000 Christmas lights at our place.
We have the only house that can be seen...

I am a teenager
Yes
A terrible, Ignorant teenager
Yeah
I'm "lazy"
But...

The man with chewing gum stuck to his shoe
Was at a loss at what to do
He could not reach his...

What urks me mostes...
The peeple that cann't spell chek.
Y cant they use spell cheker?...

Even though you complain because you have thirteen kids to feed,

You don't agree...

My Cell Phone,
One I do love,
As hours spent with you,
I've become addicted.

...