Funny

People are saying that I'm a rotten kid.
They're mad and can't believe what I did.
Summer...

A Wizard gave my cousin two choices, become an ogre or praise the new Doctor Who.
It took less than...

A taxi driver charged me fifty bucks for a short trip.
And then the S.O.B. had the nerve to ask for...

When I agreed to work for room and board, I was told that it would be good.
But the boss lied to me...

The new Doctor Who TV show is a true masterpiece, a masterpiece of shit.
I have a son who was...

Tossing and turning
trying desperately..
To catch a red squirrel
in my dreams...

WARNING: This poem contains language that may not be suitable for certain readers.

A foreign waiter...

My blind date became violent because I took her to Popeyes instead of KFC.
She didn't get her eleven...

Laugh to much without notice.
Shoving to show dislike,
While really showing you like....

I went back in time to date Pocahontas because I heard she was hot.
But when I went back in time to...

I had to do it mam ( Christine Stubbs) ?? scared for life and emotionally abused ?? but what a fantastic...

I'm a coat stand and you're a chair
I get put on you get sat on does anyone care
It's not...

Even though my son is only five years old, he's somebody who you'll clobber.
He is an adorable child...

I own a store and I sell rabbits for a living.
When people mess with me, I'm not a man who is...

The vicar's knickers were skimpy and small
They were hanging serenely against the garden wall...

I own a bomb but it's not the kind of bomb that you think.
It's a DVD and it's so bad that it made...

I made the mistake of going to a different dentist.
He did something terrible because he was pissed...