Don't be snood dee, but wattle you think about Thanksgiving gobbledygook?

The following anecdote baste
upon overactive imagination of mine
in sync with being married
and monogamously living socially chaste
once upon a time
my existence strongly resembled
life as a scrupulous anchorite,
who heartily haled
from a long line of forebears
namely Norwegian Bachelor farmers,
whose distant ancestors of mine
led a spartan existence discovered
pieced together from relics
left ample tell tale signs
buried in rubble
from countless plate tectonic activity
and one after another civilization
that came and went
buried under layers of prior occupants
revealed a history of solitudinarians,
who made no bones
about experiencing exaltation
temporarily safe from marauders
until at some unspecified date
many centuries later
grave robbers desecrated
vandalized and defaced,
rudimentary scratched out
vague archaic caricatures
interpreted as Grosse and Quade
semblances of a self portraits,
whose depictions of
weather beaten corporeal flesh
long since turned to dust,
but archaeologist speculated
Herman Hermits refrained
and abstained from drink,
nevertheless shards of drinking gourds
left trace amounts of residue
indicated formidable presence
of tribes of Village People
deduced as invading hordes
who brought by George their penchant
for One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer
analogous to lightning in a bottle
served as antidote what didst ale them
quickly adapted taste
for precursor to mixologist
cause what he brew
triggered drunken dis draught nuts
quaffed, riddled, sabotaged,
and tuckered uber vats, which
after imbibing psyches
effaced what property brothers wrought
courtesy drunk as punch rude guests,
who made themselves quite at home
subsequently trashed, pillaged,
looted, and gamesomely
filled their bellies
with wine, woman and song
abducted and masterly baited
Goo Goo Dolls from the closest
cloistered enclave of Indigo Girls,
where randy knew men
went gaga over the ladies
exchanging their treasured goods
and family jewels for chattel,
where raging testosterone
gave adrenaline rush
to aim primitive phallic weapons
and aimed slingshots to re-captcha
accessible wild birds,
who gave a hopeful run
and on the fly slapped together
feathers (the thing called hope)
affixed like waxed wings
with their body electric donned
allowed, enabled, and provided
the ability to get airborne just barely
taking to the skies,
when bipedal hominids shrieked like Shrek
and fast and furiously remonstrated
regarding strange encounters
of a third kind from an alien nation
outliers who skirted the heavens
casting dark shadows
intimating the edge of night
swarmed in from the outer limits
of the twilight zone
on a whim decided to buzzfeed
and share feast with extraterrestrials
when manning a Led Zeppelin
introduced the return of the native
foo fighting beastie boys
to a new species of yard birds
until their goose got cooked
whereby hungry hordes
became adequately stuffed then mounted,
fast forward to colonial States
where thunderbird caused a ruckus
which bird dogging became turkey (in the straw)
then flapped his trussed wings
(at the speed of soundcloud)
if listening closely
one can discern echoed refrains
from Amazing Grace,
(which words reflections of John Newton,
a slave trader
who nearly died in a shipwreck,
and who eventually became a minister.
after which he penned the famous words
of "Amazing Grace" for a sermon
for his 1773 New Year's service
at the Church of St. Peter and St. Paul)
unable to escape ill fate
i.e. being analogous
to being a cooked goose
subsequently found him interlaced
with various and sundry
other dead animals
fixed to be mounted
(courtesy a taxidermist) on a wall.

The Thanksgiving holiday dates back
to November 1621,
when the newly arrived Pilgrims
and the Wampanoag Indians
gathered at Plymouth
for an autumn harvest feast,
an event regarded
as America's “first Thanksgiving.”

Ever since then throve,
a commercialization, commodification,
commination and communication war,
where many a big box department store
large-scale buildings
of more than 50,000 square feet,
the store is usually plainly designed
and often resembles a large box
for example Walmart, Home Depot,
Tesco, and Ikea are examples
of big-box retailers,
but never forget warehouse clubs
such as Costco and BJ's
considered the original kind
of big-box retailers nevermore
to witness mom and pop businesses
(small business entities
that thrive independently and spurred
pick/pull yourself up
by bootstraps guild den age,
or family-owned) hardcore
bricks and mortar outfits
prominent during pre industrial
high societies, when
love's labour's lost evermore
venerated, serenaded, and promenaded
like The School of Scandal of trysts,
buzz feeding the literati
with tantalizing amour.