Fiction

I fell in love with a man's wife.
She convinced me to end his life.
She said we couldn't be...

My neighbor is so cheap that he uses an antique lawn mower to cut his grass.
He's the cheapest man I...

You asked for my help because you have a broken arm and leg.
I've been helping you because I hate to...

A man had a dead body that he needed to discard.
While driving through my neighborhood, he dumped...

This may be hard for you to believe.
But I always kick the asses of thieves.
While working at...

I was married to a blind woman for twenty years.
She walked out on me and it drove me to tears....

Blowing kisses to walruses
Cocooned, no metamorphosis
The taste of the reapers kiss......

I'm very angry and you'd better believe that it's no joke.
My goat ate my winning lottery ticket and...

I agreed to do a lot of yard work for a man for 125 bucks.
I did the work but when I asked for the...

I learned that my daughter's old boyfriend was a drug dealer.
He is a scumbag who turned out to be a...

Even though my wife is somebody who I love and adore,
She decided not to let me touch or see her...

Although legend has it that this Pahlavi fragment (attributed to the much earlier Bishop Ma'an of Rew...

When my wife had to go off the pill, I called a place that sells condominiums.
When I said that I...

The way I run my business is something my employees don't like.
Just because I do them dirty...

When Rocky Balboa returned from Russia, he'd been cheated out of his money, he didn't have a penny.
...

Three convenience store employees thought what they did was funny but I think it was cruel.
Those...

You've designed a new electric car and it's being built on the assembly line.
You've been pestering...