Funny

Poem -

Grumpy Old Man

"Grumpy old man,"
The young man said.
"Indeed you are very wise!
Though your lines on...

Poem -

Following Women Around The...

Following Women Around The Grocery Store

Let me tell you about an experience that wasn't great.
I would follow women around the grocery store...

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“Yodel-Odel-Ee”

“Yodel-Odel-Ee”

“Yodel-lodel-odel-ee”
his high falsetto and low chest notes could be heard.. bellowing down beyond...

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Poem -

I Was Thrown Down A Well

I Was Thrown Down A Well

A man made a mistake when he decided to throw me down his well.
He wanted me to do something but he...

Poem -

How Stealing Started a Scandal

How Stealing Started a Scandal

They said it couldn't be done, they said that my chances were slim.
I stole a Police Car from two...

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It’s a mystery to me

It’s a mystery to me

When I commence my creation I never ever know exactly just where my story will go.. of course I begin at...

Poem -

Mario is Pissing

Back in the nineties, a video game was made that was called 'Mario is Missing'.
But the game was...

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Halloween Delinquents

Halloween Delinquents

It was Halloween night but I had no candy.
But I did have an air rifle and it came in handy.
...

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Why Working At GameStop Can...

Why Working At GameStop Can Suck

Sometimes working at GameStop is good but other times, it sucks.
Last week a woman tried to buy an...

Poem -

The Lying Pen Pal

The Lying Pen Pal

Until last month, I had a sixty year old pen pal.
She turned out to be a liar and a not so nice gal...

Poem -

The Loan Shark and My...

The Loan Shark and My Missing Limbs

I have a story to tell but it's pretty dark.
I get in a lot of trouble with my loan shark.
He...

Poem -

It's Call of Duty, Not...

It's Call of Duty, Not Call of Doody

When my son asked me to buy him the new Call of doody, I said no.
I had to ground him because of the...

Poem -

Indiana Jones Got Me Killed

Indiana Jones Got Me Killed

When I was alive, I was a big fan of the Indiana Jones films but that was a mistake.
When it came to...

Poem -

I Beat Up A Gamestop Employee

I Beat Up A Gamestop Employee

I got in big trouble one day when I went to the mall to shop.
I beat the crap out of one of the...

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My Brother Chopped Off His...

My Brother Chopped Off His Hand

Some agree with what my brother did but others don't understand.
Something bad happened and he...

Poem -

Sick of Shoplifters

Sick of Shoplifters

I'm getting sick of the people who come to my store to shop.
They come here and try to steal and I...

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Why PETA and I Are Enemies

Why PETA and I Are Enemies

It all started when my damn house was infested.
I killed every rat in my house and I was arrested....