18+

" BEAUTY COMES, IN ALL SHAPES & SIZES!
& DESPITE HER SIZE, CAN BE FULL OF SURPRISES?
...

" MY FINGERS & TOES ARE CROSSED FOR 2016!
MAYBE THIS YEAR, I WILL FULL-FILL MY WILDEST OF DREAMS...

" THE PATH TO TRUE LOVE, DOES NEVER RUN SMOOTH ?
WHEN YOUR FRAGILE HEART, OFTEN NEEDS TO BE SOOTHED...

" HERE IS THE SECRET TO THE PERFECT SNOW-FLAKE !
OUT OF A SNOWMANS ARSE, WHEN THEIR WIND DOES BREAK...

" YOU BETTER NOT POUT
YOU BETTER NOT CRY!
YOU BETTER NOT SHOUT
AS IM GOING IN DRY...

" NO PRESENTS FOR YOU, NOT THIS YEAR!
FOR BEING A WANKER. NO BLOODY FEAR
DONT THINK I DONT...

" F.F.S.....SANTA, LEFT A BIT , RIGHT A BIT
I SO HOPE, I AINT GOT TO TALK YA THROUGH IT ?
YOU...

" EVEN SANTA, ENJOYS A LITTLE PORN !
WHICH HE INSISTS ON, EVERY XMAS EVE MORN ?
IT SOME HOW...

" SILENT NIGHT....SILENT NIGHT !?
THE GAFFA TAPE, PULLED REAL NICE & TIGHT
TWO QUIET KIDS...

" WE CANNOT ALL BE, THE QUEEN BITCH!
SO BEAUTIFUL, SO ELEGANT & OH SO RICH
SO STEP BACK,...

" I WANTED US TO STOP OFF AT THE TAX OFFICE
ONLY NOW, CAN YOU REMOVE THE BUTT PLUGS FROM YOUR...

" HEY YOU HO !..HOW MUCH FOR A GO ?
I,VE GOT A LONG WAY TO GO, YOU KNOW !
& IT WONT BE SO...

" HEY BIG BOY, HOLD IT RIGHT THERE
SINCE WHEN HAS NO, MEANT YEAH?
THIS IS OUR DAUGHTERS...

" IF..I FOUND 1 OF YOU IN MY XMAS STOCKING ?
BOY O BOY, THIS XMAS... WE WILL BE ROCKING!
BUT...

" HERE COMES MY , HOT PRE-XMAS WARM UP SANTA !
WHO IS ALWAYS BRIMMING, WITH SO MUCH SEXY BANTER...

" LET US ALL, JUST CHILL THE FUCK OUT !
THERE IS NO NEED, TO DASH ABOUT
SO TAKE HEED, SO I...